


Let's Split Up and Search for Clues to Get Our Bodies Back

by Amechania



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Cheesy One-Liners, Chimeras, Crack and Angst, Deviates From Canon, Dialogue Heavy, Even if it is by a bunch of kids who have no idea what they're doing, Fluff and Crack, Gullible people, I welcome you with open arms, If it's a deep interesting plot you're looking for keep it moving, Inspired by Scooby Doo, Lying in general, Lying to public officials, Maes Hughes is everybody's Dad even if they already have a dad, Nina Tucker's fursona, Nina being kept alive and well, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Philosopher's Stones, Splitting up to search for clues, Swearing, but for good reasons, envy being a little shit, if it's 3:56 in the morning&you just want them to be happy, impersonating a lot of things including a seeing eye dog, mansplaining as a plot device, melodramatic public meltdowns, mostly - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-21
Updated: 2018-12-27
Packaged: 2019-04-05 10:54:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 36,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14042712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amechania/pseuds/Amechania
Summary: Ed and Al decide that they're going to take Nina along on the hunt for a way to return their bodies to normal and narrowly escape public and government problems through their fantastic improvisation skills, the use of blatant lies, and, of course, the help of their earnest but equally ill-prepared friends.





	1. Can We Keep Her?

**Author's Note:**

> Some of these chapters will be proofread. Not this one, though. 
> 
> Warning for character death in this chapter (It's Shou Tucker so don't feel too bad) and mentioned animal injury/death.

"Hey, Doctor Tucker," Edward tried and failed to keep his voice steady, "Where are Alexander and Nina?"

It had been twelve hours since the incident at the Tucker residence. Ed hadn't slept. He was back at Central now, arguing with Roy Mustang.

"We can pull it off!" He insisted, "Let us take Nina with us on our journey. Maybe we could help her get her own body back, too!"

"I understand how you feel, Fullmetal, but you know as well as I do that there's nothing that can be done for that girl. Sometimes, terrible things happen and it's out of our hands. Speaking of which, I don't even have the authorization to place her in your care."

"Then who the Hell does? I'll go convince _them_ , dammit!"

"This one probably goes all the way to the top."  
Ed stormed out of Mustang's office. This was going to work out. He was going to make it work. He was going to do everything in his power to help Nina, whether or not he really believed they could ever return her to normal. He kept his head down and did his best to let his bangs hide his eyes. He didn't care if anyone saw how upset he was at this point. He made his way to the desk by the phones and demanded the number for Fuhrer Bradley. He wasn't really sure what he was going to say, and it was honestly pretty intimidating to know that Nina's well-being hinged on the words he was about to exchange over the phone with the most powerful man in the country, whom he had once threatened with a sharp weapon.

"I'm very sorry, Mr.Elric, but I can't just hand out the Fuhrer's phone number. Only high-ranking members of the-"

"What's this about wanting my phone number?" Bradley's voice, as always, came through sounding more like a threat than the sound a cheap blender makes to let people know that it isn't equipped to grind ice.

"Fuhrer Bradley, Sir! I wanted to ask you to let my brother and I take Nina with us on our search for a way to get our bodies back. I know it sounds crazy, but maybe we could-"

"Yep. Sounds good."

"What?" There was no way it could be that easy.

"I was going to leave her in the care of Lieutenant Colonel Hughes, but his apartment doesn't allow dogs. Your timing is impeccable, Fullmetal. She's in his living room as we speak. I'll leave her to you." He narrowed his un-patched eye. "Just be sure not to let it slip that she's a chimera. Keep it under wraps or I'm going to have to do something about her."

Ed wasn't the kind of idiot to look a gift horse in the mouth. He quickly thanked Bradley and hurried off before the mustachio'd old loon could think about it a little harder and change his mind. Him and Al didn't typically have very good luck, but someone up there was smiling down on them in a much less condescending way than usual, possibly accompanied but a thumbs-up with Ed's very own right hand.

"Al, we're going to pick Nina up at Hughes' place. She's part of the team now."

"Really? That's fantastic, Brother! How did you convince Colonel Mustang to let us bring her along?"

"Fuhrer Bradley overheard me begging the lady at the desk for his phone number and said we could keep Nina because Hughes isn't allowed to have dogs."

Alphonse didn't know what to say about that, so he just kept running alongside his brother until they reached the apartment complex. Edward was a winded mess at the top of the stairs, swear pouring down his forehead and plastering his bangs to his red face as he pounded on the door. Sprinting across town in a trench coat and heavy boots with a weighty automail arm would do that to anyone! The fact that Ed was right at that perfect age to be hitting puberty likely didn't help his case, either. With any luck, they'd encounter a shower before the stench rusted the boy's right arm and Al's armor.

Hughes' friendly, welcoming smile didn't waver even as the aroma of sweaty teenager slapped him in the nostrils as he held the door open. Being a soldier had strengthened his constitution greatly. He welcomed the brothers inside and explained to them that someone from Central had called ahead to let him know that he'd been relieved of babysitting duty. However, seeing as the two had nowhere else to stay, they were still going to spend the night. If the landlord came knocking, they were to hide Nina and pretend that they knew nothing about any sort of four-legged creature on the premises, then send him two doors down to the neighbor who always spat right by the Hughes' door before descending the stairs.

"So, I finally get my boot free from this rubble and turn around to see if I'm still being chased around in my underwear, and I see-" Hughes was having trouble sucking in breaths between laughs, "Guess. Guess who I see standing there."

"Major Armstrong?" Al was fully engrossed in the story.

"He was just my classmate, Alex, at the time, but that's right. Major Armstrong. He'd been training and a stray shot hit the shower wall, so there I was, standing in only my boots in the shower, covered in plaster-"

"I still don't get why you had your boots on in the shower." Ed poured his milk in Nina's bowl.

"Like I said, there was no room in my locker and I was going to string 'em over the side. But as soon as I closed the stall door and bent down to untie them, the wall just collapsed on me!"

Elicia laughed louder than anyone at the table. She loved her father's stories. It made Al wish that their father had been around more so that he and Edward could have had moments like this with their own family. Sure, Pinako had told stories like this, but it wasn't really the same. Was it? Al tuned back in and realized he'd missed the last bit of the story. The conversation had shifted to Mrs.Hughes scolding Ed for not drinking his milk.

"You'll never grow up big and strong if you don't drink your milk!" She cautioned.

  
"Do you want to be short forever?" Lieutenant Colonel Hughes added.

As expected, Ed bristled at the last comment, hissing and fussing about not being short. As his brief tantrum concluded, so did dinner. Mrs.Hughes offered the bathroom to Ed, and subtly suggested that he might like to use the shower, "before their long journey on the train". This family was relentlessly kindhearted. Elicia and Nina tuckered themselves out fairly quickly playing horse (with Nina playing horse for the younger girl, as Alexander had done for her in the past) and with that it was bedtime in the household. It was decided that Ed would take the couch and Nina could have the guest room, with Al right by the door to keep watch, since he didn't sleep. Mrs.Hughes tucked Nina in just like she did for her own daughter, complete with a kiss on her fuzzy forehead.

Ed lay on the couch, thinking. Suddenly, taking Nina along seemed like a much more colossal chore than it had earlier. Seeing what great parents the Hughes were, and thinking about how he and his brother, who were kids themselves, would have to take care of Nina like that while still not letting on that she wasn't just a really big dog was frightening to him. And what were they going to tell her if she ever asked when she could go home to her father? Ed was pretty sure, "Sorry, Nina, your father is a despicable monster and he lives in jail now" wouldn't go over very well. These concerns churned in his head like butter until he drifted off into a shallow, un-restful sleep.

The phone ringing in the morning woke Ed up. Mr.Hughes was already dressed and ready for work as he answered cheerfully.

"Hughes residence," he greeted, sounding awfully happy for someone who was awake at six in the morning. His eyebrows furrowed and the smile dropped from his face like a shampoo bottle that's been bumped in the shower. "I see," he said quietly, "Thank you. I'll let them know." He crossed the living room to where Ed lay, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, and waved Al over to join them.

"That was Central, calling to say that Doctor Tucker was found murdered this morning," he said, his usual cheerfulness gone.

"Good riddance," Ed mumbled, "Serves him right for what he did to Nina."

Hughes didn't take kindly to that.

"Fullmetal," he said sharply, though he didn't raise his voice enough to wake anyone else, "You can't talk like that."

"Why not?" Ed was getting loud, "The guy was a total-"

Hughes shushed him, then continued. His stern, disappointed look was enough to make a snake feel guilty. Ed was silent under its power.

"You two grew up without a father, and you lost your mother at a fairly young age, didn't you? So you should have a better idea how this is going to make Nina feel when she hears the news-which I'm sure she will, eventually. It's likely going to be in the papers by tomorrow morning, and even if you're already a day's travel away from here, people are going to be talking about it. You and I can think what we want about Dr.Tucker, but you can't be going around badmouthing him around Nina- especially not after she hears what's happened. Can you imagine how awful that poor little girl's going to feel when she hears that she'll never see her father again? I know my little Elicia would be absolutely devastated if I ever died!" He gestured at the closed door down the hall for added effect.

"Alright! I get it," Edward muttered, "I'll watch my mouth around her."

Al finally spoke up.

"So, do we tell Nina, or do you think it would be better to wait until she finds out?"

Ed stared at the blanket on his lap and didn't answer. Hughes picked up the slack in the conversation after a long moment.

"I think one of you should break it to her lightly. She knows you. It's going to be tough no matter one, but if one of you can do it delicately, it should help to soften the blow." He looked at each of them over his glasses, his gaze much softer than it had been while he was scolding Ed. "Could one of you do that?"

"Yeah, fine! What do you take us for? We've delivered bad news before." Ed crossed his arms and continued to stare at the blanket. Al wasn't as confident as his brother sounded. Ed had always been pretty harsh, and the prospect of telling Nina about her father made Al feel like he was going to throw up, despite not having a stomach. It was too late to argue, though, as Hughes stood and headed for the door. As he pulled it open, he reminded Ed to be gentle and keep in mind that Nina was a child. He threw in something about traveling safely and letting him know the next time they were in Central, then closed the door with a very silent 'click' and locked it behind him.

"Okay, Al," Ed released a shaky breath, "What's the softest way to say this?"

The two deliberated back and forth quietly for about an hour and a half, heads together eyes down at the floor. In that time, Mrs.Hughes got up and started making breakfast.

"If you two boys could take a break for a moment and wake the girls, I'd really appreciate it," She called, "I've got the table all set."

"Okay, but would it be alright if we woke Nina first? There's something we've got to tell her, and Elicia probably shouldn't hear it if we can avoid that."

"That's fine, I suppose." Mrs.Hughes said after a moment, though she sounded a little bewildered. What could a four year old hear that a two year old couldn't?

Al fetchd Nina and brought her to the couch. Her hair was all knotted from being slept on and she wagged her tail a little as she walked out.

"Mor...ning. Big brother Ed...Big brother Al. Can we play?"

If hearing her ask that in the lab had felt like getting punched in the gut, hearing her ask that now with her friendly head tilt and slow tail wags was like getting punched in the gut by a car, or Lieutenant Colonel Armstrong.

"Actually, Nina, there's something we need to tell you about your father," Ed's voice was already tightening up. He looked helplessly at Al, then took a deep breath and continued.

"You remember that time we were all in the yard and Alexander ran into the bushes and barked a lot and then came back out with a half a squirrel in his mouth and started eating it? Well, sometime last night, someone did that to your father. I- mean, they didn't eat him, but he's like the squirrel. He-what I mean to say-" Ed took another gulp of air as Nina let out a long, sad whine, her ears drooping.

"Daddy...Hurt?" She asked.

"Yeah," Ed choked out, "Daddy hurt."

"Fix...Daddy? Fix?...Make better? See soon?"

"No, Nina. He's like the squirrel. We can't fix him, even with alchemy. I'm sorry, Nina."

"He's like the goldfish you told us about," Al added in the softest voice someone could possibly use while they crammed their foot in their mouth, "The one you had to flush down the toilet. He's not coming back."

Nina broke down whimpering, her sides heaving as she let out long, horribly sad whines.

A plate broke in the kitchen and in an instant, Mrs.Hughes was kneeling on the carpet, stroking Nina's head and pulling her close. She mumbled comforting things and let Nina bury her large, fuzzy face in her side. She whipped her head up and fixed a scathing look on the boys.

Twenty minutes later, Nina was much calmer and was sitting on the kitchen floor, staring at her plate of sausage and eggs. Mrs.Hughes had set Elisia up on a stack of books with her own plate of pre-cut breakfast before dragging Ed and Al out to the living room for a well-deserved earful.

"You two," She hissed, "Could not possibly have said that worse. What were you thinking? Comparing him to half a squirrel? Or a fish that _got flushed down the toilet?_ How could you be so insensitive?"

The boys stared at their feet as the lecture continued, cringing every time she brought up how awful that must have made Nina feel. Finally, Mrs.Hughes shooed them back to the breakfast table, where she watched as Ed ate every last bite, though each felt like a brick going down. Al pitied him, his usual longing for the sensation of eating again forgotten momentarily. Nina finished her plate, too, though she was very quiet.

Breakfast was over and it was time to go. On the way out the door, Mrs.Hughes relented and also wished them safe travels. She reminded them to keep Nina well-fed, not to keep her up too late, and to get her some toys before they got on the train, or she'd be bored. Ed and Al nodded obediently, thanked her for her kindness, and waved goodbye to Elicia as Nina followed them out quietly.

"Okay, Nina. Are you excited for the train ride?"

Nina whined sadly. Nope.

Ed sent Al on ahead to the station with Nina while he stopped at a little shop to get her something to play with on the train, like Mrs.Hughes ad told them. When he got back, Al waved him over behind a row of bushes.

"What?" He hissed, wondering how the day could possibly get any worse, "Why are you standing in the bushes like a weirdo?"

"How do we get Nina on the train without upsetting anybody?"

Shit. They hadn't planned that far ahead. Ed looked around. There were a lot of people up on the platform and they had ten minutes before the train arrived. He thought for a moment, then knelt to the ground with a grin.

A pair of black glasses sat on his nose. His jacket was gone- he'd used it to make a blanket and a leash. He draped the blanket over Nina's shoulders and strut out from behind the bush.

"Remember, Nina- you're pretending to be Ed's guide, okay?" Alphonse didn't think this was going to work. They'd handed over the tickets without a problem, but when they got to the platform, some lady in a big purple hat made a face.

"What on Earth is _that?_ " She demanded, pointing at Nina.

"Her name is Nina," Ed shot back, "And she helps guide me. Thanks for being so insensitive," He added harshly, pointing to his glasses.

"Oh! I'm sorry. I've just never seen anything like her. Is she a type of bear, like up North? Do they domesticate bears now?"

"No," Al said quickly, "She's not a bear. She's just a dog."

"I've never seen a dog like her before, and my sister owns a pet shop a couple cities over. Are you sure?"

"Yeah, we're sure," Ed willed the train to hurry up and get here so they could get on and ignore people. "She's, uh, an exotic mixed breed. From...Xing."

"Really? Well, that's exciting. My sister told me that Xing had some strange animals, but-"

A man in a long gray coat cut into the conversation.

"Oh, I went to Xing just a few years ago!" He announced, "My whole family took a vacation together. I stopped by a shop or two while I was there, and I bet you she's part hairless crested rat terrier, part mountain water mastiff, isn't she? Oh, those two certainly made for an interesting dog. Just look at her fur! It almost looks like hair. I bet she's cleaner than most dogs, too. One of the people I encountered in Xing had a dog that looked just like her, but smaller, and with shorter hair, and a more compact, scrunched-up face and this one had spots. I bet they're a similar breed. If you're interested, Miss, I can tell you all about my rip while we travel!"

Ed and Al sat on one seat and let Nina lay across the other.

"Good thing that idiot started talking and covered for us. I'm pretty sure the breeds he named aren't actual dog breeds, though." Ed shot a look toward theback of the car, where the hat lady stared out the window while the same fellow in a coat continued to ramble on.

"I don't think they're real breeds, either. But it worked, so I'm happy." He looked across at Nina. "What'd you bring to keep her from getting bored?"

Ed pulled a pack of large crayons and a pad of paper out of his bag and showed them to Al.

"You got her coloring supplies?" He demanded.

"Yeah? Little girls like coloring, right? She seemed pretty happy with her crayons back at Tucker's place."

"She has no hands!" Al gestured to Nina's large, awkward paws.

Whoops.

"Whatever, Al, she's like four. She can probably draw just as well with her mouth as she could if she had hands! She can just hold it in her teeth or something, right?"

This was going to be a very, very long journey for everyone.


	2. Dr.Marcoh is a Wreck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is mostly dialogue.

"Ed, wake up. You'll never guess who's on the train with us!"

Ed pried his tired eyelids open and took a moment to appreciate just how uncomfortable sleeping on a train seat truly was. Astonishing, how something so plush could make one so stiff and sore.

"Who, Al?" Ed wiped the drool from his chin with the neck of his tank top. He missed his jacket, but it was going a pretty good job of keeping Nina hidden. He lifted his left arm to stretch and was shocked to be lifted from his seat by the wrist.

"EDWARD ELRIC, HOW GOOD IT IS TO SEE YOU IN SUCH FINE CONDITION!" Major Armstrong boomed, pulling the boy into his bare chest for a crushing hug. There were so many things Ed would have rather awoken to than Armstrong's meaty, train-sweaty pectorals pressed firmly against his cheek, but life had a funny way of spitting on him and Al at every available opportunity. Except yesterday, he reminded himself, when Nina was spared and placed in their care.

"Put me down! You're crushing me!" Ed wriggled and thrashed until he was dropped unceremoniously back onto the green padding of the train seat. He took a few much-needed gulps of air as his heart rate steadied, moving past the initial shock. The train was slowing down.

"Look out there!" Major Armstrong was plastered against the far window, staring at someone on the platform as the train slowed. "It's an old face I know from the war! We should say hello."

"You go on ahead," Ed mumbled, not particularly interested in listening to two old guys ramble on about the war. Aside from that, they were trying to keep a lower profile than usual. People were bound to notice a giant suit of armor, a man with an automail arm, a rambunctious, muscular giant, and Nina all clumped together at the train station like four mismatched socks sitting in a drawer of neat pairs.

"He studied medical alchemy. Perhaps he could aide you on your quest to-"

Ed was already slipping the leash back around Nina's neck. She needed some fresh air and a good leg stretch, anyway, right? What kind of guardian would he be to keep her cooped up on the train? Kids and dogs always had tons of energy, so surely a dog kid would be grateful for a chance to explore a new town. He slipped the glasses from the day before back on and Al helped him coax Nina onto the platform.

"Hello! Doctor Marcoh! It's me, Armstrong! I haven't seen you since the war, and I thought we might do some catching up toge-oh, he's gone." Dr.Marcoh ran very quickly for an old man.

"Don't let him get away!" Ed cried, giving chase. Nina loped alongside him, her hair flying in the wind. They ran up hills, around corners, through alleyways, and deeper into town. Finally, Ed stopped to catch his breath. They'd totally lost him.

"That's okay, maybe we can ask around. I'm sure someone in town must know Dr.Marcoh," Al suggested.

"Yeah, alright. Let's split up and see what we can find."

"Edward, I'm going to be honest with you. That's an absolutely terrible idea. We'll stick together for now. Give me a moment and I'll work up a quick sketch," Armstrong produced a pencil and a pad of paper from his coat. He was a surprisingly good artist, and worked quickly.

"Excuse me!" Ed called, flagging down a young lady in the square, "Can you help us? We're trying to find somebody."

"Oh, you poor little boy! It must be terribly frightening to be lost in your condition. Of course I'll help you find your mother, you poor thing!"

"I'm not a little boy! We're looking for this man. Can you help us?"

"Oh, I see. You're looking for Dr.Marcoh! I'm sure he can help with your eyesight. He lives right up there- I'm pointing up the hill, little boy, just so you know- and I'll write down the address for you. Have one of your friends read it, okay? And maybe he can make your poor dog less ugly, too. Was she hit by a car?"

For someone trying to be helpful she managed to be very condescending and insensitive. Still, her directions were good, and in no time, they'd climbed the stairs and were knocking on the door. It was, of course, booby-trapped, but that wasn't a problem for two state alchemists.

"You'll never take me alive! I'm not going back to the military!"

"Doctor Marcoh, we're not here to take you back to the military," Armstrong assured the old man, tearing his shirt off and embracing him in a firm, reassuring manner. Marcoh was never quite so certain that he was about to be executed.

"Look, we're here to ask for your help. We're state alchemists, and we heard you study healing alchemy. We'd like to look over your notes for personal reasons, if possible."

"I'll never share my terrible knowledge with anyone! Never! Not even somebody blind who can't read them!"

"I'm not really blind. It's a disguise."

"Why are you in disguise?"

Ed and Al exchanged a glance, not really wanting to elaborate.

"Play guide...Big brothers...play guide." Nina wagged her tail a little bit, nuzzling Doctor Marcoh's leg. "Play with us. Play guide. Doctor Marcoh play guide."

Marcoh made a high-pitch grinding sound, like a train coming around a bend, staring at the girl in horror.

"A chimera?"

"Don't be rude. Her name is Nina and we want to help her."

Ed kept his hands on Nina's ears as long, sad conversation ensued and the boys revealed their tragic past to Marcoh, and their search for a philosopher's stone to return their old bodies. He also explained what had happened to Nina and her father. Armstrong dabbed at his eye with a kerchief as the story unraveled, his heart aching for the poor children he was traveling with.

"Wow, that's awful. I'm sorry about your mother, and your bodies, and your father, and everything else, but I really can't give you these notes. They're terrible. I have an incomplete philosopher's stone myself and it's terrible, even unfinished."

"Are you saying it doesn't work? The townspeople seem to have faith in you."

"Oh, no! It works tremendously well. I can do all sorts of fantastic alchemy and heal a lot of people with this. I don't think it's right for you, though. Very evil. You should avoid it at all costs."

"Why?"

"I can't tell you. It's too awful. Of course, you could always kill me and take my stone."

Ed picked up Nina's leash and opened the door.

"We're leaving. Thanks a lot, doc, but we've got to get going now. We have a train to catch and I really don't want to talk to you anymore, especially since it's clear you're just going to keep being cryptic and weird about all this."

"Alright, son, have a safe journey. Don't keep looking for the secret of the philosopher's stone! Goodbye, Armstrong. Good seeing you again."

"Are you sure you won't help us?" Al asked, lingering in the doorway for a moment.

"I've never been more sure about anything in my life."

"Please?" Nina cocked her head to the side, flattened her ears to her head, and sat back on her haunches, bringing her paws up to beg. She'd probably picked that up from Alexander. Not a good habit.

Marcoh slammed the door on them. The four made their way back to the train station quietly.

"Wow, that was terrible. Did you see his face talking about the stone?" Al was braiding Nina's hair. It was just too long to keep down. It got too messy too fast.

"Yeah," Ed muttered. A few people cast a glance in his direction. "I mean no, because I'm blind."

The train pulled up and opened the doors. As people started shuffling on board, frantic footsteps sounded on the stairs.

"Wait!" Doctor Marcoh was waving some papers over his head. Score. "I've changed my mind! Here are some of my notes. You can find my other works in the state library."

"Thank you, Doctor!" Al took the papers. "I thought you said you'd never been more sure about anything in your life, though?"

"I've lived a very unstable life with little to no certainty at any point ever. Good luck!" Marcoh left them to finish boarding as he went home to mix a steep glass of something to make him forget his regrets for a few hours.

"Hey, Ed, shouldn't we have gotten back onto the train headed to Central? That's where the library is. We're going to wrong way."

"Nah, we're heading home for a little bit. I haven't been maintaining my automail at all. Also, neither of us knows anything about how to raise children or a dog, so we're going to ask Winry and Pinako about that."

"Oh. Good thinking! I just hope they aren't too upset when they meet Nina."

"I'm sure it'll be fine, because we're not going to tell them anything." Hiding things from loved ones is always the best course of action.

"I don't think that's such a good plan," Armstrong told them.

"Oh, yeah. Where are you heading, Major?"

"I've been assigned to keep an eye on you, and make sure that Nina doesn't cause a fuss."

"Or what?"

"Don't worry about that. I'm sure it won't happen."

"But what if it does?"

Armstrong didn't reply. Instead, he looked away and began flexing.

"Major, what if it does?"

Silence and flexing.

"Major?"


	3. A Really Shitty Place to Make a Phone Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw for death, burns, and guns in this chapter. Hey, it sure would be a shame if something happened to Maes Hughes, wouldn't it?

Scar had killed the doctor who made the chimera-he was certain that it had been the right guy. He'd introduced himself as Doctor Theo. He'd been under military protection. It had to be him. There was just one little problem: the chimera itself was missing. Scar had heard it was some disgusting abomination, a sin against nature and God- a malformed mess of a monster, melded together by the malicious madman. The alchemist's equivalent of slamming a car into a tree so hard that the two become stuck together. He couldn't possibly allow such a miserable creature to wander around, knowing that there was no hope for the poor little girl within to ever have any sort of happiness in her life again. He'd send her along mercifully, so she wouldn't have to suffer such a terrible fate for however long she may live.

Well, as soon as he found her, that is. Currently, he was investigating a tip that a strange young man had been seen at the train station with an even stranger dog, and had boarded heading for Resembool. He himself had caught the next train going that direction, and was in hot pursuit.

Meanwhile, back at HQ, Mustang was in his office fighting to stay awake. Coffee didn't seem to have any effect on him anymore. He'd reached the point where he was still exhausted after his last cup, but had begun to shake and could feel his pulse in his neck and wrists. He had so much work to do and so little energy to do it with.

"Perk up, Sir. You have a visitor." Riza, keeping him in line as usual.

"Tell whoever it is to piss off. I don't have time for distractions."

"It's Lieutenant Colonel Hughes."

"Even worse. Pretend I'm out somewhere."

A hand clapped his shoulder.

"Now, now! Is that any way to treat a friend, Roy my boy? Absolutely not! Especially not one who's about to buy you lunch."

"I don't have time to stop what I'm doing. I appreciate the offer, but I'm afraid-"

"I wasn't asking! You're exhausted and Riza tells me you haven't eaten since four yesterday afternoon. Besides, there's some urgent matters I'd like to discuss with you, and who knows if we'll be able to talk later!"

Twenty minutes of complaining and arguing later, Mustang and Hughes were seated at a booth in the back of a small cafe. The server brought a black coffee for Roy and a tall glass of iced tea for Hughes-a lot of ice, and a little tea. He informed them that their meals were on the way and would be finished shortly.

"So, what are these urgent matters you've dragged me away from my desk to discuss? Did your daughter draw you a picture or something?" Exhaustion hadn't killed Roy's dry sense of humor.

"Yes, actually! She drew the whole family the other day, and we put it up on the fridge. She's already so talented. I wonder if she'll grow up to be an artist? Oh, I'd be so proud!"

"Is that all you wanted to tell me?" Roy dug some money out of his pocket and slapped it on the table. He was ready to go if this whole thing had just been a waste of time.

"Actually," Hughes dropped the cheerful father persona and fixed a hard glare on Mustang, his voice suddenly very low, "I think there's something seriously wrong happening with the government. The Elric brothers visited the other day, and I got curious. Looking back at their files, I saw that they'd settled some sort of cult activities in Liore. The problem had pretty much been sorted out, but government forces came in and now the place is in a state of chaos. It's not terribly dissimilar to what happened in Ishval. Things were going well, but the presence of the military started worse conflict than there had been to begin with. It's happened elsewhere, too."

"What are you getting at, exactly?"

"I'm not really sure. I just think that there might be something strange going on, but I haven't figured out what or why. Causing problems seems counter-productive, so why does it seem to be a pattern here?"

The men sat in silence until the food came.

"Actually, I'll take mine to go," Roy told the server, "And we'd like our bills, please."

"I told you already! Lunch is on me. Keep it on one tab, my good sir!"

After paying, the two lingered at the booth with their takeout bags.

"Let me know if you find out anything else, and I'll keep my eyes open for any new information that you might find interesting. For now, I think we should keep this between the two of us, at least until we know if this might just be coincidence or we have more evidence on our side." Mustang slid his now-empty coffee cup to the middle of the table. "Thanks for lunch. Tell the misses I said hello."

"Any time, old friend! It was great catching up like this."

The two headed back to HQ together. Hughes waved Roy off with instructions to take a nap as they parted in separate directions.

Though he hadn't really intended to kill any more of his afternoon, Mustang really couldn't help it. He dragged himself to the records room, propped himself up with a book in front of him, and passed out.

The loud THWAK of a heavy book slamming into the desk he now had his head down on woke him rudely.

"Have a nice rest, Sir? It's good do see you laying around on a desk, just like your paperwork."

"Yeah, yeah, spare me the lecture. How long was I out? An hour and a half?"

"What time did you get back from lunch?"

"Around two-thirty."

"I see. It's nine forty-five. I've been looking for you since four."

She had to be kidding. It was _nighttime_? And so late at night? How could he have made such a mistake? He'd have to work straight through tomorrow, and probably the day after that, with no breaks-not even to get coffee. He rubbed his eyes, not looking forward to the grueling tasks he'd have to take on.

"It's late. We might as well call today a wash and try again tomorrow, don't you think?" Riza closed the book Mustang had been drooling all over, not bothering to chide him for ruining it.

"Fine. I'll walk you home."

"Thank you, Sir, but that's not necessary."

"It's fine. Besides, there's something I need to discuss with you."

Downstairs, they passed the main desk.

"Colonel Mustang, do you know what happened? What was all the commotion just now with Lieutenant Colonel Hughes? Is everything okay?" The woman behind the desk looked very concerned.

"What commotion? Is something wrong with Hughes?"

"He came out of the reference library just now bleeding, and was going to use the phone, but left."

Roy took off running with Riza at his side, gun drawn. Soon they were approaching the payphone out by the courtyard. Someone was standing under the streetlight, holding a gun. It looked like Second Lieutenant Maria Ross, but something was off. She suddenly morphed into a completely different woman. Roy and Riza both recognized her immediately as Gracia Hughes.

"You look surprised," She said, her finger on the trigger.

The gunshot echoed in the open area.

The gun clattered to the floor as "Mrs.Hughes" clutched her hand, the wound closing quickly.

"Good shot, First Lieutenant," Mustang congratulated, "And nice job on the disguise, whoever you are. But unfortunately for you, I know Hughes, and he'd never be dumb enough to fall for a stupid trick like that and end up not coming home. He's got people waiting for him. Isn't that right, Hughes?"

"Yeah," less-than-confident voice croaked from the phone booth.

"Start talking," Mustang ordered, "Who are you and why are you after Lieutenant Colonel Hughes?"

"Like I'd tell you," the impostor hissed.

Whatever. If this bozo was bound by an oath of silence and they were willing to keep it, they'd be just as useful and much less threatening as a corpse.

"Hughes, do you smell that?" Mustang asked.

"What?"

"Smells like someone left the oven on." Roy snapped and the stranger lit right up, screeching in agony as the flames charred flesh.

Envy took that as a cue to leave. Still burning in places, the homunculus made a quick exit and headed back to meet with Father.

"Do we pursue?" Riza demanded, keeping her gun trained on the enemy. Not that it mattered much, at this distance. Not with a revolver, anyway.

"No. The last thing we need is to run into a trap. It would be better to stick together for the time being, especially since my alchemy didn't turn that bastard into a pile of ash on the first try."

"You're losing your touch," Hughes joked.

"Pretty soon you'll be useless whether or not it's raining," Hawkeye agreed.

"It's not safe here. Let's go back to my place for now. We can talk in the morning." Mustang fixed his gaze on the blackened brick. Something else caught his eye and he stooped to pick it up.

Oh, shit.

"Actually," He added, handing the slightly crispy photograph back to Hughes, "Let's get your wife and daughter first. They might be targets, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It would have been such a shame that I don't even think it should happen here in this version. Foreshadowing be damned.


	4. Impersonating a Ventriloquist

One thing that the brothers hadn't anticipated was just how much shedding Nina would be doing- not just of her cream-colored fur, but of the long, brown mane that streaked down her back and blended with her tail. They found hair on _everything_. It was all over the train seat, and the floor, and little bits of it stuck to the window. Ed's black clothing showed every little follicle. Even the food they got from the trolly seemed to always have hair in it by the third or fourth bite.

"We have to do something about all this hair," Ed groaned, trying to swipe some off of his shirt and trousers, "It's like a sweater fell apart all over us."

"Maybe we should cut it?" Al suggested.

"No...No cut. No cut hair. Hair pretty...Long. Like long."

Ed hurriedly clapped a hand over Nina's mouth, praying that nobody had heard her.

Once again, prayer was pointless for the eldest Elric brother.

"Did your dog just talk? And in such a creepy voice? Oh, it's a monster! Get it out of here!"

The hat lady was walking by again, wearing the same floppy abomination on her head. Who wore a hat indoors, anyway? Maybe a knitted cap or something, but a giant, overly-decorated sunhat? That was just too gaudy.

"No."

"Yes."

Damn. Alphonse needed to learn to respond to things by lying immediately.

"What he meant to say was, yes, I'm teaching her to speak. It's a party trick! Ha. See, we're traveling ventriloquists and we're warming up for our next act. We're just rehearsing right now so that we're all ready for when we stop!"

"Oh. Well, you should pick a different voice for your dog. The one you have right now is terrible. In fact, you should probably consider training a cuter dog."

"Her voice is beautiful and she's perfect how she is!" Al was ready to defend Nina to his death from this lady's venomous words.

"Mean...Lady. Wear ugly hat."

"How _dare_ yo-wait, your lips didn't move. She really does talk! Oh, how fowl!"

"You're wrong! I'm just really good at my job. I watch her mouth very carefully and-"

"But you're blind!"

"I meant that my brother watches very carefully and tells me using our really cool sibling telepathy. Twins have that, right? We're twins by the way."

"You look nothing alike!"

"How do you know? He's in a suit of armor! And how would I know? I'm blind!"

"Excuse me, Ma'am, but are you bothering this poor boy?" Armstrong loomed over the horrendous woman and her horrendous hat.

"Major Armstrong! Yes, she's bothering us a lot. We're over here minding our own business, rehearsing for our ventriloquy event, and she starts insulting Nina."

"What? You two aren't-" Armstrong picked up on Ed's 'Please, go along with it' look and corrected himself, "Oh! Of course. Your show. Well, that's very rude. Madam, perhaps things would be better if we all returned to what we were doing."

"Fine. But I don't trust that thing. You should keep it on a leash." A few overly-dramatic stomps later, the woman was back in her seat, ignoring the same man from the station. Karma truly did exist.

"Thanks, Major. We were digging ourselves a pretty deep hole back there." Ed grinned and ruffled Nina's mane. "It's tough for Nina to keep quiet on these long trips. It's boring, y'know?"

"She had a point."

Ed and Al exchanged a glance.

"About the hat? Yeah, it's pretty ugly." Al sounded nervous.

"Not Nina. The woman. About the leash. People might be more comfortable if you were to-"

"On the train? Are you kidding me? It's bad enough she has to wear it anywhere!"

Al and Armstrong shushed Ed. Losing his temper would draw too much attention.

"She's a little girl," He continued in a quieter voice, "She shouldn't have to be on a leash."

Armstrong made a displeased noise, but didn't push the issue any further.

"Alright," He agreed, "But at least do something about all the hair. It's getting everywhere. You should comb her at least once a day."

"That's fair. Me and Al were just talking about that, anyway."

Nina wagged her tail a little.

"Play dress up. Make hair pretty. Big Brothers dress up, too."

"Keep your voice down, Nina," Alphonse reminded her.

"Yeah, and this isn't a makeover. It's for hygiene, like brushing your teeth." He knit his brow and put a hand over his mouth. They hadn't brushed her teeth since they got on the first train. Shit. It wasn't like she could do it on her own, either. They were going to have to do something about that once they got to Resembool. Hopefully, that would be before nightfall.

"Want to be pretty. Play makeover. Fun. Train boring!" Nina was getting louder again.

"Alright, alright, Nina! We'll do a makeover when we get back home. Keep your voice down." Ed cast a glance over his sunglasses, but thankfully most of the other passengers were busying themselves with something else and not particularly interested in what the brothers were doing.

"Sorry, Nina. We know it's boring. We'll make it up to you by having a lot of fun while we're in Resembool, okay?" Al pet her gently. "In the meantime, how about I tell you a story? Have you heard the one about the old lady who lived in a shoe?"

She had, but Nina listened intently anyway. She liked stories. She missed the ones her father used to tell her.


	5. Sometimes Family is Smarter Than We Give Them Credit For

Ed pounded on the door. Al and the Major stood behind him on the steps, Nina sleeping peacefully in Armstrong's arms, her chin laying heavily on his shoulder while she snored. The walk from the train station had been long, and they'd taken their time heading through the countryside. They'd stopped frequently to let Nina play with the butterflies and run through the tall grasses. They'd even had a game of tag after they stopped for lunch. Her mane was now matted and full of seed pods, and she was covered in dirt and exhausted, but it was the most fun she'd had since being turned.

Pinako cracked the door and peeked through before swinging it open fully.

"You could have called." She looked him up and down before adding, "Don't know what I expected, though. Short notice from the short boy."

Ed's tantrum woke Nina. She lifted her head and wagged her tail excitedly as the Major set her down. She padded over and greeted Pinako with a friendly, "Hello."

The old woman set a gaze sharper than broken obsidian on Ed.

"A chimera? And it talks?"

Whoops. They hadn't expected her to know much of anything about alchemy, let alone chimeras.

"No, never!" 

"Sorry, Pinako. She's really friendly, though!"

Ed shot Al a furious gaze. He needed to teach Al a script or something for when people asked.

"Her name's Nina," He explained, "An alchemist named-"

Armstrong elbowed Ed and cough, swiping his hand horizontally back and forth across his throat in the 'cut it out' motion.

"...An alchemist who did this to her. She used to be a little girl and her pet dog. Now she's just a little girl."

"She's filthy is what she is," Pinako snapped, "What did you do, drag her through every bush on the way here and then have her roll in the dirt?"

The upstairs window opened and Winry popped her head out.

"Ed! Al!" She waved, surprised and happy to see them, "I'll be right down!"

They heard her door slam from the porch, then two sets of fast-approaching footsteps: one on two legs, one on four. 

Ed quickly whispered, "Don't mention any of this Chimera stuff to Winry."

Den got to the door first, pushing past Pinako to give everyone a friendly sniff. Winry was hot on his heels and greeted her boys with a hug.

"How come you didn't call and let us know you'd be coming?" She asked.

"We get it, we get it. More notice next time." He was probably going to forget.

"Puppy...Just like Alexander."

Shit.

Everyone fell silent as Nina spoke again, "Nice puppy. Leg like Big Brother Ed."

Winry's hands flew to her mouth in shock. 

"What is that thing," She demanded, "And why is it so filthy? Did you do this?" The last question was sharp and accusatory, directed at Ed.

"Of course not! We're just looking after her. She's a dog."

"She just spoke."

"You can teach dogs tricks, like speak. She can also sit down and roll over. You know, Den does tricks, too." Ed wasn't as good at lying to Winry. He knew that she knew him too well.

"You're lying!" She'd called his bluff, "And that's not even how dogs learn to speak. What is that thing?"

"Stop calling her a thing! Her name's Nina." Ed glanced at Al for support, but the younger brother shook his head and shrugged a little. He didn't like lying to family. 

The Major spoke up. "She's part of an alchemy experiment gone awry. She isn't hurt, but she needs looking after and the Elric brothers were kind enough to volunteer for the job."

At least he hadn't mentioned the chimera part.

"Oh. Well, that was very nice of them." Winry eyed them suspiciously, "How out of character for you, Ed." Before he could come up with a retort, she extended her hand, "I'm sorry, it was rude of me not to introduce myself. I'm Winry. I assume you've already met-"

Pinako cut her off, "Call me Pinako. I'm Winry's grandmother. I assume you're all staying here for a while?"

The trio on the porch nodded sheepishly. 

"Well, no need to stay on the porch all night. Dinner will be ready shortly, and there's plenty for everyone." She fixed her eyes on Nina and added, "Ed, how about you and Winry give Nina a bath before she ruins the furniture?"

"Alright, Granny."

Ed wrinkled his nose. "I don't need Winry's help! I know how to work the shower."

"Winry was always better at bathing Den than you were, so stop complaining and march."

It took half an hour of scrubbing in the warm water to remove the thick layer of filth. After that, they ended up brushing out the matted mane by using up most of Winry's conditioner. They stuck the hair to the shower wall as they went so that it wouldn't clog the drain.

"What's with this stuff?" Winry asked, brushing out the last of the tangles while Ed held the water on the spot, "It doesn't feel like fur."

"Well, you know. Fur, hair, they can be pretty similar." He didn't look up. Winry was getting suspicious.

"Make pretty," Nina was getting riled up, though she'd been very well-behaved for the bath, "Make Nina pretty."

"You're already looking much better now that you're clean," Ed assured her as Winry toweled her off, "And now you get to go sit by the fire and dry off."

They led her back downstairs to the fireplace to join Al and Armstrong. Nina and Den lay side by side on the carpet, Nina occasinally running her enormous paw down her new friend's side and muttering, "Good doggie." 

Winry watched her closely. After a while, she fixed her eyes on the boys and said, very pointedly, "You know, she's just like a little girl."

None of them would meet her gaze, instead electing to look anywhere else in the room.

"She is one," Pinako called from the kitchen, "Now set the table."

Well...At least she hadn't given _everything_ away about Nina's condition. Winry excused herself quietly and set five places with the good porcelain, filled Den's bowl, and with another quick glance at Nina, set another porcelain plate on the floor next to her own seat. Pinako brought the dishes out one serving bowl at a time- nothing too fancy, some mixed greens, mashed potatoes, and (much to Ed's delight) a pot of stew.

Al stared longingly at the pot from his seat while everyone else dished up. Winry placed a full bowl in front of Nina, careful not to put it down in the potatoes. Everyone made small talk over dinner, the Major told stories about his days in training, Ed and Al shared what they could about how their lives had been, and Winry told them how the townsfolk were faring. Pinako mostly just listened.

Finally, when dinner was over, Nina was tucked into Winry's bed while everyone else gathered around the fire.

"So, what is Nina, really?" Winry asked quietly, running a thumb over the back of one of her work-scarred hands, "Grandma mentioned that she was a little girl."

Ed glanced at the Major for permission, then told Nina's story-minus a few details, such as names, and why the experiments were being carried out- and how he'd run into Fuhrer Bradley himself and plead his case to become Nina's new guardian.

"So, someone made a mix of her and her dog? That's so awful! How's she supposed to live like that?"

"Well, we're trying to make it as normal as possible. I had to pretend to be bind on the way here to get her on the train. I think we're going to have to come up with some other excuse on the way back. Oh, and I have to remember to get her a toy or something before we go. The train ride was really boring for her, especially since she can't really speak in front of all those people."

"And we have to brush her teeth," Al reminded him, "We haven't done that in-" He caught Winry's angry stare and finished lamely, "-in a while."

"As I recall, you two also promised her a makeover day while we were here," The Major added, "To make up for how bored she was the entire trip."

"Right. We'll get her a bow or something on the way out of town."

Winry crossed her arms. "A bow? You call that a makeover? You drag that poor girl all the way here, make her sit quietly the whole time with nothing to do, and you're going to pull a trick like that? I don't think so. Tomorrow, you, Al, and I are taking her into town and finding her some cooler accessories than just a bow. And, I'll help you style her mane. Maybe we could cut it short so it's easier to take care of."

"Nah, she wants to keep it long. She was really upset when we mentioned cutting it."

"Fine, then we'll figure something out. You two are _not_ about to let her down on my watch! She's going through a really tough time, especially now that she has no family, and we're going to do everything we can to make it less tough on her. Understood?"

"Yes, Ma'am!" Ed, Al, and the Major all responded out of habit. 

"Er, yes, you three do that. I'll just tag along to watch." Armstrong cleared his throat.

It was decided. Nina was about to have the time of her life, and absolutely nothing was going to ruin her special day!

On a completely unrelated note, Scar was disembarking at the Resembool station, asking about a kid and his armored companion traveling with a strange-looking dog.


	6. The Best Day Ever, Part 1

They set off for town at around eight the next morning, figuring they'd be there by nine when most places opened up. Resembool didn't really have a booming downtown- just a few shops, a tiny grocery store, and a couple of little cafes. Still, to a little girl like Nina, it would be an exciting outing nonetheless. She was already pulling ahead of the group and circling back, urging everyone to walk faster. The Major elbowed Ed. They couldn't have her running off. He gave Armstrong the stink eye, but called ahead anyway.

"Calm down, Nina- even if we get there faster, nothing's going to be open until nine. And stay on the trail- bathing you wasn't easy, you know!" The drowsy alchemist watched in dismay as Nina's long,shaggy fur picked up every last particle of dust, grass, and pollen it came into contact with. They'd probably end up having to give her another bath before Pinako let her back in.

"Oh, right! Shampoo and conditioner. Some to replace mine and some for you to take for Nina." Winry scratched the words into her notebook before going back to chewing on the pen, deep in thought. 

"Do we really need a list?" Al was peeking over her shoulder. "I think we can just remember what we need. It's only a few items, right?"

"So far I've filled a whole page."

Ed stopped in his tracks. "With _what_?! We're doing a makeover, not planning for three months in the woods!"

"Exactly. We're going to need shampoo, conditioner, a comb for the knots, a brush that'll help remove all the fur she's shedding, another brush for smoothing, some oils to keep her mane silky and detangled, hair ties, ribbons, nail clippers for sure-"

"Alright, alright! I get it. Yeesh, I thought this was going to be easy."

Winry gave him a too-hard pat on the back. "There's no short way to beauty. That's probably why it skipped over you."

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY, HUH?"

 

Scar was keeping a low profile in the park. He was seated by the fountain, enjoying its cool mist. It was already getting hot out. He pulled the wide brim of a sunhat he'd bought back in Central over his face and pushed a pair of round shades up his nose. Those he'd found them on the ground at the train station. Very fortunate, as they helped to hide his red eyes.

Nothing would be open for another fifteen minutes. He could smell baked goods coming out of ovens and coffee brewing. His stomach wailed at him to get it together and find something to eat. He checked his pockets, heart sinking as he realized he only had thirty-eight cenz. He stuffed the coins back in his pocket and considered his options.

He could ignore his hunger for now in favor of keeping a lower profile, then try to find something once it was dark and he was less likely to be recognized. Or, he could keep looking for the heathens that called themselves the Elric brothers, traipsing about the countryside and dragging the poor mutilated child along with them. With any luck, he'd find something to eat along the way. 

Stealing was technically an option, but not one he was really willing to consider as of yet. He'd been raised with morals, and he knew that stealing food meant taking it from the mouth of somebody else.

He wasn't quite that desperate yet. For the time being, he elected to keep resting in the park and keep a low profile. He'd ask about the Elric brothers, but only if he saw somebody who looked like they were busy and wouldn't be paying much attention to his face.

Or his growling stomach.

 

"Hi, there," Al greeted the man at the barber shop, "We were wondering if you had any brushes for sale that work for dogs."

"What do you mean, 'work for dogs'?" The fellow's mustache rivaled Armstrong's.

"I mean-dogs have different brushes, right?" Al was second-guessing himself.

"Yes, but this is a barber shop. For people. If you want to find dog brushes, you're probably going to have to head to the city."

"Well, they don't have to be for dogs specifically, we just need something to help keep Nina's coat silky and not so tangled."

The man nodded. "That's reasonable. What kind of coat does she have?"

"Fur."

"No, I mean the texture."

"Fuzzy?"

"But is it bristly, smooth, shaggy...? Curly or straight? Thick or thin?"

"Yes."

"Yes what?"

"Yes...Sir?" Al could feel himself digging a pit of embarrassment. He had no idea what this guy was talking about- hair was hair, right?? 

The barber gave up.

"Look. I have no clients right now. Just bring the dog in and let me take a look at her."

"Are you sure? She's kinda big."

"Bigger than a poodle?"

"Standard or toy?"

"What?"

"You asked me if she was bigger than a poodle. Do you mean a standard poodle or a toy poodle?"

"A real poodle, not a toy."

"Toy poodles are real poodles."

Silence, then a sigh.

"Forget it, just bring her in."

 

This time, Al wanted to enlist Winry's help. She'd know what she was talking about, so he wanted her to come with.

"I can't." Winry was staring at her list.

"Why not? You're here anyway!"

"I have to pick something up from one of the other shops. Actually, I need you to come with me. Just send Ed in."

"He won't know what he's talking about, though!"

"I'll write down all the hair stuff from my list and give it to him. Besides, have you seen your brother's hair? He totally knows what he's doing. It'll be fine."

"Okay. Do you think him and Nina will be okay?"

Armstrong cut in to their conversation. He'd been blatantly eavesdropping the whole time, but from a polite distance.

"Fear not, young Elric! I'll keep your brother and Nina safe from harm. You and Winry have no need to worry- go run your errand, and when you get back, we'll have everything we need to keep Nina's mane tamed."

With that reassurance, Winry explained the plan to Ed, handed him the page from her notebook, and led Al deeper into town.

 

"Where are we going?"

"Grocery store. Granny wanted me to pick up some stew ingredients. We'll have to haul them around all day, but since we'll be getting there right when they open, we'll get the best stuff."

Al longed to taste Pinako's stew again. He made a mental note to put a star next to it on the list of things he was going to eat when he got his body back.

"We're also stopping by the bakery," Winry added as an afterthought, "We left without eating breakfast. Ed might be fine skipping meals, but Nina's still growing."

Al wondered briefly if his own body was still growing, wherever it was, or if it was like Brother's and had just figured that being the height of a ten year old would be okay forever.

He shuddered at the thought. If there was nothing else good about his body being a suit of armor, he could at least take pleasure in being able to reach things that were too high up for Ed. 

 

"Alright, Miss Rockbell. Here's your receipt." The kindly old couple at the grocery store wished Winry and Al a good day, and told her to say hello to Pinako for them.

"I will. Thanks!" 

Al was on bag holding duty. Not that he minded. It wasn't like his arms got tired.

They got to the bakery and Winry took a look at the selection.

"What's Ed's favorite? And the Major?"

"I don't know if Ed has a favorite anymore. I'm pretty sure he just eats whatever you put in front of him, except milk. As for the Major, I'm not really sure, either. I haven't seen him eat."

"Everyone has a favorite." Winry stared intently at the display, wracking her brain. What was it he always got when they were kids? A little light bulb went off in her head and she placed her order.

"Don't you think you got kind of a lot for five people, especially since Granny doesn't really like sweets?"

"You and Ed eat a lot. And I know she doesn't like sweets- that's what the bag of rolls is for."

"Then that's even worse! You got a baker's dozen worth of pastries for four people! I can't eat, Winry, and Nina shouldn't have too many sweets."

Whoops. That had slipped her mind while she was ordering. She'd been too excited about surprising everyone with breakfast.

She stared at the paper bags, overflowing with sweet, doughy goodness.

"You're probably right, Al." She shrugged. "Well, I guess the rest will keep for a couple days. We'll just have to make room so they don't go wrong." 

Soon they were passing the entrance to the park, and Winry paused.

"Hey, Al, how do you think the others would feel about a picnic? We could let Nina run around for a couple hours, then hit the last few shops on the way home."

"I think that sounds like a great idea, Winry. If you'd like, I can go get them and we'll meet you here."

"Sure! I'll wait by the fountain. Thanks, Al."

 

Winry took the pastries with her and made her way down the dirt path, past the tall, well-groomed oak trees and out toward the manicured field. In the middle of the field were a few benches where old folks sat and fed chubby pigeons by the fountain. There was still one free bench, fortunately for her, and she snagged it quickly so the others would have a place to sit while they ate.

She recognized everyone around her- the man who owned the book shop and his wife, which undoubtedly meant their son was in charge for the day and the shop would be opening late, the grocer's daughter and her friend, watching the baker's two kids, some tall beefy guy in a sunhat and shades, gripping his stomach-

Wait, who was that guy? Resembool didn't get a whole lot of tourists. Mostly visitors were just relatives of the folks who lived there, or people stopping briefly to get supplies between trains. This guy seemed out of place somehow. Winry couldn't quite place a finger on why he made her anxious, but the feeling was there. Maybe if he weren't acting so strangely, she'd be less suspicious.

Then, his stomach growled. Winry cursed herself for being judgmental. He was probably just a hungry traveler, and was too shy to explore. Well, Winry wanted him to have a good first impression of the hardworking folks in Resembool. No self-respecting person would let a visitor go hungry around here.

She smiled and approached the stranger, reaching into the bag.

"Hi, there. My name's Winry. My friends are on their way here for a picnic- would you like to join us? There's plenty to go around."

At first, it looked like the stranger was going to politely decline. "I'm fine, but thank you for-" His stomach shrieked in protest, rumbling loudly.

"I insist," Winry told him, offering a strawberry danish from the bag, "We'll be happy to have you."

He took it reluctantly, and moved to join Winry on the bench.

"So, what brings you to Resembool, if you don't mind my asking?" Winry wished the others would hurry up so that the conversation could flow more naturally. Small talk was always so uncomfortable!

"There's some people I've been trying to find. I heard that they might be around here."

"Oh? Well, maybe I can help. It's a pretty small town, so we usually notice when folks visit. Are they family?"

"No, just some people I've been trying to catch up with."

"Huh. Well, after our picnic, maybe you could join us in town. We're running some errands and such, but you could ask around. Maybe somebody's seen your friends passing through."

Scar was beginning to think that this town might not be so hostile toward strangers, if he would just act normally. Maybe he could even ditch the hat and stick with just the glasses. He had his doubts that anyone around here was going to cause him any trouble.

 

Then, the Elric brothers showed up with a large man in full military uniform, carrying shopping bags with a chimera loping lazily at their heels.


	7. The Best Day Ever, Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs for blood, death, guns, violence, and war for this chapter.

Scar couldn't believe his eyes. Even through the shades, they were unmistakable- and the chimera was just out in the open with them! They were parading the poor, disfigured creature around like a pet! How low could a group of people sink? How despicable does one have to be to think hauling that poor, pained creature through the world was okay?

"Hey, Winry!" Edward waved casually, "Al told us you had a picnic. Good thinking- Nina was just starting to get hungry."

Nina? As in Nina tucker? The poor little girl turned into a monster by her father and a pet by the brothers? They weren't even feeding her? Scar could hardly believe what he was hearing.

"Who's this with you?" Al asked, setting the grocery bags down next to the bench.

"Oh, this is-" Winry paused, then turned to Scar sheepishly, "I'm sorry. I forgot to ask your name. How rude of me! I should have asked so that I could introduce you properly. These are my friends- Ed, Al, Major Armstrong, and Nina." She gestured to each as she mentioned them,"And you are...?" She dropped off politely, waiting for him to finish the sentence.

"Where I come from, a name is a sacred gift from God," Scar began, rising to his feet, "I abandoned my given name long ago." He removed the sunglasses to reveal his face. "Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist, you have committed an unforgivable sin. I'll give you a moment to pray to God." Alchemy already sparked from his fingertips. He was going to make this a very, very brief moment.

"What are you-" Ed's question was cut off as the Major shoved him back, assuming a protective stance.

"I've heard of you," Armstrong spat, "The Ishvalan man with a scar who goes around killing State Alchemists. Your killing spree ends here." The other townspeople who had been lingering by the fountain seemed to realize what was happening and hurried off, hopefully heading back to call it in and get some reinforcements sent out. Not that the reinforcements would be arriving in time to really make a difference, but at least they were out of the way.

"The _what_?" Winry leapt to her feet and reached for Scar's arm. Surely this was a misunderstanding! Ed hadn't done anything to warrant the death penalty from a stranger.

Scar slapped her hand away and shot her a glare. "Don't get in my way, or I'll be forced t-"

The ground beneath Scar's feet shifted suddenly, hurtling him into the air. Alchemy? He hadn't even seen anyone draw a circle!

"Leave her alone," Ed spat, "She didn't do anything wrong!" He and Alphonese were already rushing past the Major to attack.

Scar landed on his feet and sprinted forward. This wasn't going to be an easy battle- he was up against two State Alchemists, and he wasn't sure how well the boy in the armor could fight.  He took a swing at the armored brother, but for such a large man in a heavy suit he moved very quickly. He didn't have time to finish the swing before Edward slammed his hand to the ground, drawing the earth up once more and landing a crushing blow to Scar's chest. He hadn't used a circle. Scar began to wonder if he might be outmatched.

He narrowly manged to dodge the Al's metal fist- clearly, the two were accustomed to fighting together. They had excellent teamwork and followed each other's attacks perfectly, never giving him a moment to counter.

He heard the whistle of air pass his ear as a metal bolt whizzed past his head. The Strong Arm Alchemist had taken the chimera and made his way over to Winry. It seemed that he was going to be attacking from a distance while trying to protect the girl and the beast.

More bolts came quickly, one right after the other. Between them and the brothers, Scar was unable to attack. They didn't quite have him pinned- he just needed one of them to slip up so he could make his move. Once one of the brothers was down, it would be much easier to subdue the other.

Something suddenly caught Scar's eye in the sun- a metallic glimmer in Fullmetal's sleeve. Automail. Perfect.

The next time Ed tried to land a punch, scar grabbed his arm and shattered the automail. That took care of one alchemist. He threw the boy to the ground and raised his hand, ready to deal the final blow.

He hardly managed to strike Al's foot fast enough to avoid a devastating kick to the head. The entire lower part of the leg flew off the suit of armor.

 _Empty!_ There was nothing in it. The younger bother was just an empty metal shell!

Alphonse took advantage of Scar's surprise and landed a firm punch to his shoulder, knocking the man away.

"Ed, are you okay?"

"Fine! I just can't use my alchemy."

He rose shakily to his feet. Those two wouldn't be as much of a threat now that there was no alchemy involved. Instead, the problematic one now would be Armstrong. Scar feigned a rush toward the boys, then swerved and instead went for the Major. A little too slow. He missed with his alchemy, and the kick he'd followed it up with had done nothing to phase the brute.

"Winry, take Nina and run!" The major tore his jacket off. It was a liability for now. Glancing back to see Al on one foot and Ed with no arm and no alchemy, he added hastily, "You boys get out of here, too! I'll take care of this!"

Not if Scar could help it. He attacked quickly, but not quickly enough. The major blocked every move, but they were strong enough and in quick enough succession that he found himself being driven back.

It was working. Scar suddenly broke off from the Major and went for the Elric brothers.

Al blocked Ed, but he was shattered almost entirely in the process. The seal was fine, but he couldn't fight anymore. Ed had been knocked to the ground. Catching a glimpse of more automail beneath the boy's now-shredded pantleg, Scar broke that too.

He was caught off guard by the Major's bolt, but thankfully it only got his arm. It was a deep gash running along his bicep, but nothing irreparable.

"Watch it! You're going to hit Ed!" Winry hadn't left.

"Winry, get out of here!" Ed and Al screeched in unison.

"I can't just leave you two like this!"

Armstrong kicked Scar away and called to Winry.

"It isn't safe for you to be here! I'll be able to do a better job keeping those two safe if I don't have to worry about you and Nina!"

Scar landed a surprise hit to Armstrong's knee,bringing the larger man down. He was mid-swing for a finishing blow when something bowled him over, a sharp pain shooting through his arm.

Nina had sunk her fangs deep into his forearm, jerking her head back and forth to better tear the flesh. Everyone was screaming-pleading with Nina to get away, Scar was going to kill her.

Scar saw his opportunity. He reached for the chimera with his other hand.

BOOM.

"That's enough! All of you, stop it!"

Everyone froze.

Winry was uncomfortably close to scar, Armstrong's gun clutched in her shaking hands, pointed in the air. She'd fired a warning shot, but as Scar made eye contact she lowered the gun to aim directly at his head.

"None of you make another move. That's enough." She took a deep breath, her eyes like chips of ice as they pierced Scar, "My name is Winry Rockbell. You're hurting my family." She paused to address Nina more gently, "Nina, come back over here with me. You have to let him go right now." 

The girl released her grip on Scar and slunk back behind Winry's legs. The blonde's eyes had never left their target.

"My parents were doctors in the Ishvalan war. I don't want to tarnish the family name by becoming a murderer, but I'm not going to let anyone else get taken away from me." Her voice faltered toward the end, and tears started rolling down her cheeks. She clearly wasn't feeling as strong as her hard glare might suggest.

Rockbell. Why did that name sound so familiar? Doctors in the Ishvalan war? Had their paths crossed on the battlefield...?

Oh no. Scar suddenly put two and two together.

"I remember the Rocbells," He told her, keeping his voice as cold and flat as he could manage, "They were good people. They helped me, and I killed them. I'm sorry."

As soon as the words left his mouth, he wondered if there might have been a better way of phrasing that.

"Why? Why would you kill them? They were trying to save people!"

Scar could see the moment playing in front of his eyes, over and over.

"There's nothing I can say that will make what I did okay. You have every right to shoot me, but if you do, I'll consider you an enemy and come after-"

"I want to know!" Winry's voice was too loud, and her teeth chattered between the words. The shaking had gotten worse. "Why did you kill them? Why are you trying to kill Ed, too?"

Scar didn't answer fast enough. Her finger began tightening around the trigger.

"Winry!" Ed's voice was firm, but not angry. She froze. He rolled onto his side and pointed with his good arm. "You're scaring Nina." The last bit was more gentle, but there was an edge of desperation. She was scaring him, too.

Winry risked a glance behind her to see Nina, crouched low in the grass and whimpering, blood streaked across her muzzle and staining her chin from the bite she'd dealt Scar. 

"No more die," She begged softly, "No more die."

Winry's breath hitched in the throat. She didn't want anyone else to die, either. She hated scar. She hated him with every cell in her body. Her parents had helped him, and he killed them for it. Hell, she'd helped him this morning and now he was trying to kill her friends. She was so, so angry. But she couldn't pull the trigger anymore. She glared back at Scar.

"Fine. Don't tell me why. I guess it's not important, anyway. They're gone. You did it. If you're really sorry, fix it now by getting out of here and never trying to hurt my friends again. They haven't done anything to deserve this- they're innocent, just like my parents."

"They're dragging a chimera around, forcing it to live in pain! It was human once, and now it's just a monster. You saw what it did earlier-" Scar gestured to his arm, "And it'll do the same to someone else if it isn't put down. They must pay for-"

Winry's fury boiled over again.

"She bit you because you were attacking her friends! I'm doing the exact same thing right now- no, I'm doing worse. I'm pointing a gun at you. She didn't try to kill you, she just wanted you to stop hurting the last few people in the world that love her! And as for Ed and Al torturing her? You're wrong about that, too. They volunteered to take care of her because they didn't want that to happen. In fact, today was supposed to be her special day. We were doing a makeover. She's a little girl, and people have been calling her things like _ugly_ , and _scary_ , and _monster_ ," acid dripped from each of the words as Winry listed them, "Today was supposed to be fun. We set the whole thing aside for her. She was just at the barber shop with Ed getting special shampoo and conditioner. She was about to have pastries for breakfast in the park with her friends. We were going to take her home and style her hair and get her a scarf and maybe paint her nails. We were going to take her to pick out a new toy. We had everything all planned out, and it was going to be perfect. Then I invited you to join us and you ruined everything. You tried to kill us, and you destroyed the park, and you made that little girl so afraid that she bit you! Look at her!"

Scar looked at the chimera, shaking behind the blonde's legs. He saw her with her ears back and her tail tucked between her legs and blood on her face. Worse of all, beyond her shaggy bangs, he saw her big, sad, fearful eyes. Eyes that he'd assumed would be more animalistic, or full of anger, or maybe even just blank and soulless. But no, in those sad, hollow eyes, he saw a child in pain, just like he'd seen back in Ishval. Guilt washed over him. He took a breath and met Winry's gaze once more.

"Fine. I'll go. I'll forget the Elric brothers for now." He stood shakily, holding his bloodied arm. He'd have to fix that once he was hidden.

"Go? He's a fugitive! We can't just-"

Winry shot a look at the Major and he stopped himself. He looked at her, then Nina, then back at Ed and Al on the ground. Children. Children shaking and covered in blood, crying with guns clutched in their hands, and on the ground in pieces. A wretched but familiar sight. Taking all this in, he muttered, "Maybe a stalemate isn't the worst way for this to end."

Winry kept the gun trained on Scar as he left, just in case he tried to pull anything dirty, but he just kept going. She doubted that she would have been able to make herself pull the trigger anyway. Once he was completely out of sight, and a little more time had passed, Ed broke the silence.

"Hey, anyone think the pastries survived? I'm starved!" His grin didn't fool anyone, and nobody laughed at his joke. Armstrong gently took his firearm back from Winry, limped over to his shredded jacket, and wrapped his knee.

"I'm going back to town to get a wagon," He told them, "It'll make carrying Al back much easier." He tossed the remainder of the jacket to Winry. "Use this to clean yourself and Nina up a little bit."

It was a long way home. The Major pulled the wagon along behind him, despite Winry's protests about his knee. Instead, she was assigned as Ed's human crutch.

"You're closer to his height," The Major explained.

Everyone was exhausted. Nina dragged herself along, head down, the full way. Winry wished that she could have carried her, but with Ed leaning heavily on her shoulder for support, there was just no way.

Pinako was waiting on the porch. As they approached the bottom step, she hobbled down to meet them.


	8. Licking Wounds

The old woman looked the group up and down silently. Her brow furrowed and she white-knuckled her cane. No one in the group could look at her.

"Ma'am, I'm afraid there was an indecent this afternoon and-" 

Pinako took a mighty swing and cracked her cane across Armstrong's bad knee. With a great deal of effort, he managed to stay on his feet. His injury had been painful before from the long trek home, but now, it was nearly intolerable.

"I lend you my grandkids for a few hours and this is how you bring them back to me?!" Pinako waggled her cane threateningly, "You were supposed to be watching them! What the Hell happened?"

"Grandma, it's not his fault!" Winry dropped Ed (whoops) and snatched the cane before she could assault the officer again, "He did his best to protect us. We got into a fight with an alchemist in the park, and-"

"You dragged my granddaughter into an alchemy duel?" Pinako was fuming. 

"Hey! It all worked out in the end,"  Ed told her from the ground, "Winry scared him off with the gun, and nobody died, so-"

"You gave Winry a _gun_? She's never fired anything before! She's a mechanic, not a mercenary!"

"He didn't give it to me, I took it while he was down. The guy was going to kill Nina and Ed, and-" Winry's own words hit her like a ton of bricks. She'd almost lost more people today. Before she knew it, her throat was tight, breathing was difficult, and she'd clapped her hands back over her mouth. Tears were leaking steadily again, and air came in gasping, shaky sobs.

"All of you, in the house. _Now._ " Pinako pointed severely. 

Winry picked Ed up fairly easily, and Nina slunk up the stairs with her tail between her legs. The Major hesitated, staring at the red wagon full of Al's mangled armor.

"I don't think the wagon's going to make it upstairs," Al told her quietly.

"Then I'll carry the piece of you that talks." Pinako was stronger than she looked, and took the chunk of the torso with the seal, along with the helmet, up the stairs.

"And of course there's no groceries, so stew's off the table. You'll all have to be content with grilled ham and cheese sandwiches for dinner." Pinako was already slicing bread and cheese, "Winry, wash Nina, then you're next in line for the shower. After that, Armstrong can help Ed, then take his own shower."

"I don't need help showering!" Ed protested, "I've still got one arm and one leg that work."

"The last thing we need is you slipping and hitting your head. They don't make automail that can repair brain damage, and you're stupid enough as it is."

Ed almost continued arguing, but catching his surrogate grandmother's eye, he thought better of it. There'd been enough conflict today.

Ed, Al, and the Major sat by the fire for forty-five agonizing minutes, trying to ignore Pinako's harsh stare from the kitchen. Just when they thought it might be impossible for Winry to take any longer, she came down stairs in a fresh change of clothes. Ed winced a little as he caught sight of her new cuts and bruises. He didn't want to see the people he loved get hurt, either.

"Alright, boys, your turn. Major Armstrong, try not to get Ed's automail wet. A sponge bath might be better tonight," Winry waited for him to nod agreement before adding, "Also, we're out of shampoo."

Great. Just what Ed needed- now he'd have to use regular, drying soap on his poor hair.

Nina followed Winry down the stairs and over to the fire. She didn't go lay close to its warmth, as Winry would expect, but instead stuck close to the older girl's heels, electing instead to lay next to the chair.

"Aren't you cold, Nina?" Winry prompted, "You'd be warmer closer to the fire."

"Don't want to be far away," Nina buried her muzzle under her paw, "Don't want Winry and Big Brothers to go away like Daddy."

Winry's heart shattered like a Christmas ornament beneath a boot.

"We're not going anywhere, Nina. Don't worry. We won't leave you alone." Winry knealt down on the carpet and pulled Nina into a hug, not caring that the drenched fur was soaking her fresh black tank top and shorts. She held the younger girl close, soothing her just as Pinako had done for Winry when she lost her own parents.

"You were very brave today, Nina. I'm so proud of you. But you worried us- we were scared that the bad man might have hurt you, too. In the future, if Ed and Al ever get in a fight, I want you to run to somewhere safe and wait for them to come get you, okay?"

Nina was quiet for a long time, but eventually nodded.

"Okay...Wait somewhere safe. Then they come, no matter what."

"That's right. Nobody's leaving you again, Nina. Nobody wants to leave you."

Al began to speak up from his spot on a stool.

"Uh, Winry, we might not-"

Winry shut him up with a single look. Sure, everyone died eventually, but that wasn't what Nina needed to hear right now. She knew from personal experience. They could have another talk about death some other time. Right now, Nina needed reassurance. She let go of the chimera just long enough to scoot closer to the fire, then pulled her back into another embrace. Everything was fine for now, she told herself, everyone had survived, and everyone's injuries would heal or could be fixed. There was no need for her to think about how bad things had gotten earlier. The moment had passed. She didn't have to be afraid now.

But she was. She was still terrified. She'd almost lost them, she thought. She was almost left behind again. She had seen the man who killed her parents. He'd tried to take even more of her people from her. And why? He couldn't even tell her that. She sat quietly with her face in Nina's fur, bits and pieces of the fight playing on loop in her head. Ed and Al being broken. Nina with blood on her face. Her own hands shakily clutching a gun. The same things, over and over.

"Well, that was harder than it had to be," Ed's complaining snapped her out of it as he plopped down in what had been her spot on the chair. Damn.

"I believe that young Edward's automail has been kept bone-dry, Ms.Rockbell." Armstrong crossed his arms, beaming proudly, "And I took the liberty of replacing your shampoo and conditioner with my own. No need to head back into town before you're ready."

"Why do you even _own_  that stuff, you giant bald building?" Ed was fidgeting, trying to find a comfortable position around the bits of wires and sharp scraps of metal protruding from his limbs.

"For my mustache, of course! How do you think I keep it so soft and well-kempt?"

Pinako seemed to have teleported from the kitchen, suddenly materializing behind the chairs. She was very quiet when she wanted to be.

"Well, now that you're all together, there's a few things I have to get off my chest." She stood with her hands on her hips, tapping her foot. Everyone prepared for a firm lecture about how she expected them to exercise better caution in the future.

Instead, the old woman went to Winry and Nina, then Ed, then Al, hugging each as she passed.

"I'm so glad you're all home safe," she told them. She patted the Major's bad knee carefully. "I hope you'll excuse my little outburst earlier. This wasn't your fault any more than it was theirs. Thank you for bringing them home."

"Pinako..." Al didn't know what to do with his emotions. Times like this, he missed the ability to cry. He wondered why Ed never seemed to do it anymore.

"Well, that's enough mushy stuff. Sandwiches are on the table. Let's eat before they get any colder."

Several small, pleasant conversations attempted to start themselves during dinner, but nobody really had the energy left to keep those balls rolling. They were exhausted, physically and emotionally, and pretending that everything was alright was just too hard. They'd have to start fresh in the morning. One by one, the kids excused themselves. Winry helped Ed over to the couch, then went back and brought Al over to join him. After that, she carried Nina, who had already dozed off, upstairs. She still had that much strength left, at least.

The Major excused himself for a cigarette, though he didn't smoke. He sat alone for about half an hour with his face buried in his large hands as his tears fell.

He'd almost seen more kids die today. He'd failed to keep them safe. If it hadn't been for the young girl's bravery, he was certain that they would have, at the very least, lost Nina. At worst, the Elric brothers and Winry could have been killed, too. He supposed that he himself could have been a casualty, but the thought didn't bother him nearly as much as the others.

This wasn't the first time he'd doubted his decision to become a soldier.

A small hand found his shoulder as Pinako took a shaky seat beside him.

"Excuse the state I'm in," Armstrong wiped his eyes, "I'm ashamed as both a man and a soldier, but-"

"Don't be. You've seen some terrible things, and today you went through something else awful. You're old enough that I bet you saw Ishval. Terrible war. And today, you fought again with four kids and no other backup. I'd probably be in tears after a fight, too, if I'd seen the things you've seen. But the fact of the matter is, if you hadn't been there, this house might be empty right now. I don't know what I'd do with myself, sitting here alone."

"Your granddaughter is really the one to thank. If it wasn't for her quick thinking-"

"She got lucky, and it sounds like she did that pretty late in the fight. Who knows how long they would have lasted if it had just been her and the boys against the bastard. And, if nothing else, you being there provided Winry with the gun that stopped the fight. Can't say I'm glad she picked it up, let alone fired a shot, but at least nobody died." She adjusted her glasses, "And at least she had the good sense and the good fortune not to become a murderer herself. If it had come down to that, I don't think she would have been able to cope. She's not a soldier, like you or Ed. She doesn't kill people."

"God bless her for it," Armstrong murmured, "And may she always be so smart and so lucky."

"Amen." Pinako stood, once again using the Major's mighty shoulder for balance. "It's getting late. I'm going to bed. I'll leave the door unlocked for you."

"No!" Armstrong rose too quickly, pain shooting through his knee. "I, uh." He didn't really want to say he was afraid of what might happen if the door wasn't locked. "I was just about to turn in myself, actually. Thank you for our kind words. No need to leave the door unlocked for me. Goodnight."

Though he was exhausted, and knew that the Military would likely be arriving very early the next morning to make their report, it took Armstrong several more hours to fall asleep in the chair, facing the dark, empty fireplace.


	9. Hiding the Evidence

It was barely five in the morning. The sun was barely peaking over the horizon. The rooster half a mile up the road hadn't crowed yet. The flowers were still dozing in the morning dew, petals not yet unfurled.

All of this, and yet Pinako was awake and answering the rudely-insistent knocking on the door.

"I'm coming!" She called bitterly, rubbing the sleep from her eyes, "I don't move as fast as I used to."

Two dark-haired men and a blond woman, all in military uniform, stood on the porch. Two out of three were familiar- the shorter man and the blond. They were the ones who'd come right after Ed and Al had tried to transmute their mother.

"Ed! Al! Major! Get up. The military is here." She waved them in and started the kettle. "Coffee or tea?"

"What kind of tea do you have?"

"Black."

"Breakfast blend?"

"Yep.

"One of those," the tallest of the trio requested cheerfully, "With cream."

"And two coffees," the woman added, "Black."

Ed didn't have the energy to put on fresh clothes around his broken automail. Apparently, the Major was feeling more lively. He was in and out of the bathroom in what seemed like the blink of a (still very sleepy) eye, emerging in a fresh uniform. He grabbed the scraps of Al off their perch and offered his arm to Ed, hauling the two brothers to the table. His limp was much worse than it had been the night before.

"Good morning, Colonel Mustang, Lieutenant Colonel Hughes, First Liutenant Hawkeye. Always a pleasure to see you."

"Let's cut the rest of the bull and get straight to business," The Colonel said once the pleasantries were over, "We need to discuss the attack."

"Yes, yes- the Elric brothers and I barely escaped Scar yesterday."

"What?"

"The attack yesterday. The one you three are reporting on, I presume?"

"We weren't aware that there was an incident yesterday. This is in regards to the matter I wrote to you about-the one involving Hughes."

"I haven't received any letters since I left Central, I'm afraid. I had assumed you'd been sent to see us."

"No- actually, we're on the lam, unofficially."

Three mugs hit the table, one accompanied by a tiny pitcher of cream.

Someone rapped insistently on the door and called, "Military police."

"Shit." Hawkeye grabbed Hughes and the Colonel and pulled them upstairs, hissing to the Major, "We're not here."

"Coming!" Pinako took her time answering.

"Sorry to bother you at such an early hour, Ma'am. I'm Second Lieutenant Maria Ross, and this is my partner, Sergeant Denny Brosh. We're here to talk to the Elric brothers and Major Armstrong." She took a quick glance behind her before adding, "We have the correct address, yes?"

Pinako nodded and waved them in. "Yes, yes. They're waiting at the table. Tea or coffee for you?"

"Coffee would be wonderful, thank you." Ross wiped her feet before entering and made her way to the table.

Bosh followed, pausing about halfway to the table to call over his shoulder, "Actually, one for me, too, please, if it's not too much trouble."

"Oh. There's already some on the table." Ross eyed the cups, "Are we interrupting company?"

"No!" Ed and the Major assured them at the same time.

"Oh. Whose are these? Is it okay if we move them over?"

"Oh, sure! They're ours. Just. Slide them over this way and let's get talking!"

"Who had the tea?"

"Al."

Brosh and Ross exchanged a glance.

"We were warned about your, uh, special circumstances," Maria said carefully, "I was under he impression that you didn't really eat or drink. Especially since right now you're just a helmet."

 _Shit!_ Ed tried to think up an excuse, but thankfully, Al was on the ball.

"Why won't you just let me pretend!" He wailed loudly, wobbling his helmet in his seat, "I'm still a person, you know!" He kept his voice high and made it wobble to let them know how upset he was. He couldn't cry, but he could sound like he was crying.

"I'm sorry! Didn't mean to offend you! That was insensitive. I'll stop prying- let's just get this interview done, okay?"

Two more mugs hit the table.

"Cream or sugar?" Pinako offered warmly.

"No thank you," the two answered in unison. It was suddenly very awkward for them, and they regretted sitting down for coffee in the first place.

"Well, if you need anything, I'll be upstairs cleaning. Don't mind the noise." Pinako caught Ed's eye. She was going to go figure out what to do about the other three officers.

"So," Ross held a pencil to her notepad, staring intently, "What happened yesterday? Start wherever you think is important."

Ed exchanged a glance with the Major, who shook his head ever so slightly. They probably shouldn't mention Nina.

"Well, my brother and I were in town visiting and we went out with Winry- she grew up with us- to run some errands."

"Anything related to the military?"

"No. Just normal stuff. We needed some groceries and dog stuff."

"Dog stuff?"

"For the Rockbell's dog- Den," Ed told them.

"And you were attacked while running these errands?"

"Not quite-we went to the park to eat lunch," said Al.

"And Scar ambushed you while you were eating?"

"No- he was there with Winry. She didn't know who he was. She'd invited him to join us, mistaking him for a hungry traveler."

"I see. We may need to speak to Ms.Rockbell, too, before we leave, if that's the case."

"She's asleep."

"You'll have to wake her."

"Fine. After we're done here, though."

"That's reasonable. So, you encountered him at roughly what ti-"

A loud shriek erupted from upstairs.

"OH WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT. GUESS SHE'S AWAKE. I'll go get her!" Ed stood too quickly, forgetting that he was on one leg, and fell flat on his face.

"That woman sounded like she was in trouble!" Ross and Brosh already had their guns drawn. "You three wait here- we'll go make sure everything's okay."

"Actually, maybe I'd better-" Armstrong didn't get to finish. They were already halfway up the stairs.

"You're injured, Major. Leave it to us!"

 

Winry had awoken to three strangers in military uniform peering at her from under her desk. It was enough to startle anyone into screaming.

"Shhhh!" Pinako slapped a hand over her granddaughter's mouth, "Friends of Ed's. They're not here. Don't let the two outside see them or Nina." The chimera was currently at the foot of Winry's bed, glancing anxiously between the desk and the ladies of the family.

Footsteps pounded on the stairs. Winry sprang out of bed and stood in front of the door facing the back of her room while she pulled her pajama top partway over her head to expose her full back and part of her stomach. Her grandmother reached up to pull it back down.

"WINRY! What are you-"

The door slammed open and two guns were aimed at Winry, who shrieked again.

"Perverts!"

"Ah! Excuse us!" The door slammed shut once more and the blond pulled her shirt back down.

She stepped back outside with Pinako.

"Winry, these two are here to take a report about yesterday."

"Sorry for startling you, ma'am," the two poor officers stood red in the face and looking anywhere but at Winry, "We heard a scream."

"I saw a spider." Winry lied, "It just fell off the ceiling when I looked up! Grandma says it missed, but I'm going to change anyway, so please don't come in!"

"Right. Sorry. We'd like to talk to you downstairs when you're done. No hurry." Bosh couldn't get down the stairs fast enough, and Ross was hot on his heels.

"What happened? Why are you two so red?" Al asked.

"Nothing. False alarm." Ross reclaimed her old seat, "Please continue where we left off."

"Which was...?"

"What time was it when you were attacked?"

The rest of the interview went fairly smoothly, and Winry came downstairs to give details for the last few minutes.

"Well, thank you for your time. We really should be going. The military will contact you if there's anything I've missed in this interview, or if it's decided that any measures need to be taken. Have a good day." 

Their coffee cups were still full when they let themselves out.

Winry watched them go from the window, waiting for them to disappear down the path before calling, "The coast is clear, Grandma! Send them down." She fixed an angry glare on Ed. "You've got some explaining to do. First off, why were those three in my room?"

"They went to your room? Seriously?"

The trio marched downstairs with Pinako behind them.

"You three saw all those doors, and instead of hiding in the bathroom or something like normal people, you hide in the room that's got somebody _sleeping_ in it? What the Hell's wrong with you!"

"If they'd needed to use the bathroom, it would have been suspicious to turn them down! Besides, it all worked out didn't it, you loud-mouthed shrimp?" Mustang shot back.

The rest of the morning was a chain of explanations- the incident with Scar, the incident with Hughes, the incident in Winry's room- and arguing about what to do next.

"Well, we can't just sit here arguing all day. It's getting warm out and my poor wife and little Elicia are still in that shitty car on the train!"

"My car's not shitty!" Mustang spat, "And that's your fault, anyway. I told you we should have just brought them with!"

"And risked the military seeing them? No way!"

"What train is the car on?" Ed asked.

"The one that pulled up here this morning. From my understanding of the schedule, it should be here until tomorrow, when it leaves for-"

"No. It's gone. The nine o'clock train is the one that sits here all day. The earlier trains all stop here for about fifteen minutes then keep going. Your car and your family are probably all the way in Rush Valley by now."

It was hard to tell who'd screamed louder- Mustang or Hughes- but both were understandably upset by this development.

"They're out there all alone," Hughes wailed, "I'm a terrible husband and an even worse father!"

"Well, we should probably go get them," Winry said, "I need some stuff to fix Ed anyway, so this actually worked out perfectly!"

" _Perfectly_?" What planet are you living on?? My wife and toddler are alone in a car smuggled onto a train parked in the desert!"

"Yeah, Winry, that sounds pretty bad when he puts it that way." Ed was already standing shakily on his single leg, "So we should probably get going pretty quick here."

"Grandma, we're leaving for a few days!" Winry called, racing upstairs to get her things.

"Call when you get there."

Pinako had become accustomed to abrupt company and abrupt departures. She poured four mugs of coffee and a mug of tea down the sink. What a waste.

The shambling seven moved as quickly as they could- which was, in fact, extremely slowly, due to the injuries they'd sustained and the fact that they were trying not to be noticed despite each sticking out like sore thumbs- and boarded the afternoon train to Rush Valley. They checked into two hotel rooms- one for the boys to share (despite it only having one bed) and one for the girls. Winry called Pinako, as she'd promised, and was surprised when her grandmother asked to speak to Ed.

"Hello?" He sat on one of the girl's two beds, thinking about how unfair that was.

"You forgot Nina, you short dumbass!"

Pinako was very, very unhappy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your patience and for the kind comments!! I'm not replying to them individually right now, and I'm sorry for that, but I do read them and I appreciate it a lot! ;v;


	10. Travelers and Babysitters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for pointing out the typos! I don't catch most of them before I post and it's really helpful. Bear with me! xD

"Okay, so let's call today a bust since we got here so late to begin with and Pinako used up another half an hour hollering at me on the phone." It hadn't been very late when they'd disembarked, but by the time they'd found the hotel and checked in, it was nearly dark. Unpacking took even more time, especially for Ed, who refused the Major's help.

"Why bother unpacking, anyway? We're only gonna hang around for a couple days while we look for some automail parts and the Hughes family."

"But young Elric, won't it be easier for you if everything is hanging in the closet so you don't have to get up and down to drag that suitcase out from under the bed?"

"...No."

Al had tried to get him to suck up his pride, too, but it just wasn't happening. The way he figured, he'd have a new arm and a new leg soon enough that putting up with some inconvenience in the meantime was totally worth it.

"So," He changed the subject, "When Hughes and the Colonel get back, what are we going to do about the bed?"

The other two had gone out to prowl the trainyard and see if they couldn't find Gracia and Elicia. When they'd checked the schedule upon arrival, it said that it should be sitting overnight, which was fortunate, but they weren't exactly sure which boxcar they'd parked on, and with seventy or so to search, they had their work cut out for them.

"That is a problem," Armstrong said, fiddling with his mustache, "I'd planned on taking the chair. Right now, sitting feels better on my knee, anyway. However, that leaves you, Alphonse, Lieutenant Colonel Hughes, and Colonel Mustang. I would think that they'd let you have the bed, because you're injured-"

"I'm not injured! I'm just missing my automail. I'll be fine on the floor. Those two old men can fight over the bed!"

They hadn't even heard the door open.

"Keep your voices down," Mustang barked, "And who the hell are you calling old men?"

"You two," Ed hissed back, keeping his voice lower.

"What's this about us being old? We're the picture of good health! Isn't that right, Roy?"

They both looked terrible. They had dirt and oil all over them, bags under their eyes, and were walking stiffly. Prying open train doors and crawling around over boxes wasn't as easy as it used to be, especially after doing mostly desk work for several months.

"Yeah, whatever. You two figure out who's sleeping on the bed, I'm setting up on the floor for the night."

Ed tossed a pillow down and hobbled over to the closet to drag the spare blanket from the top shelf, barely managing to stay on his feet. Everything was so much damn harder than it needed to be right now.

"Well, Hughes, I can manage on the floor tonight." Roy grabbed another pillow from the bed and the last spare blanket from the closet, "You rest up for tomorrow."

"There's no way I'm gonna sleep up there if you guys are on the floor." Hughes took the last pillow and the comforter off the bed, picking out his own spot on the now extremely-crowded floor, "It wouldn't be fair. I'll be just fine sleeping down here, like in the old days."

"You guys are idiots," Al told them from the table, "And if nobody else is gonna call it, I am. Dibs on the bed."

Armstrong lifted the helmet and the little piece with the seal off the table and lay it gently on the sheets, building a little nest around it.

"Well, I'm turning out the lights," He announced, sitting back down with minimal weight on his knee, "We've got a big day ahead tomorrow."

With that, he turned the lamp off and the boys fought to fall asleep in their uncomfortable spots on the floor.

 

Meanwhile, Winry was in her pajamas, worrying. She was worried about Ed and Al, and how long it would take to get them each back into one piece, and about how Nina would be doing after everyone had ditched her with Pinako right after telling her that nobody was going to abandon her, and how Pinako was doing alone in the house taking care of Nina.

"Something wrong?" Riza asked, stepping out of the bathroom in her own pajamas with a towel on her hair.

"Nothing. I'm just being a worry-wart." Winry tried to wave her off. She didn't want to drag anybody else into her problems.

"Is this about what happened with Scar?"

The older woman's question caught Winry totally off-guard. She hadn't been thinking about that- there were other things to keep it out of her head- but now, it was playing back again. Nina covered in blood. Ed and Al laying there helplessly, yelling at her to run away. Clutching the gun and taking aim.

"You were very brave," Riza told her, crossing the room to put a hand on her shoulder, "It couldn't have been easy for you to do that, but you did. Everyone is safe thanks to you. Nobody had to die."

But they had _almost_ died. That was the scary part. And worst of all, Winry herself had almost killed someone.

"I couldn't do it," Winry told her, voice growing higher, "I couldn't have pulled the trigger. Not after Ed told me I was scaring Nina. But before that, I was so angry-!"

Tears were falling again.

"But you took hold of that anger and overpowered it," Hawkeye took Winry's cheeks in her hands, "Look at me. You saved everyone who was there that day, including Scar. He didn't deserve your mercy, but you showed it to him anyway. That's what sets you aside from the rest of us." She wiped Winry's eyes with her sleeve, "You're a good kid, Winry. You made the right decision. What's more is that you made the right decision when it was hard to do so." Her eye contact broke as she looked at her own feet, "Pulling the trigger is easy. You hit what you were supposed to, and you're a hero. What you did was harder. You found a way to diffuse the situation without having to pull that trigger. Your peace didn't rely on blood. That's the kind of peace that we should hope for in the future."

"But what if I'd _had_ to, and I couldn't-"

"Dwelling on the past like that with 'What if's' isn't a good way to move forward. Don't doubt yourself, Winry. You have good instincts and a good heart." Riza backed away and sat on her own bed, "I can see where the Elrics get it from."

Winry still wasn't quite sure, but Hawkeye's words meant a lot to her. After all, for someone who'd been called a hero for her ability to pull a trigger to praise Winry for her ability to not pull a trigger had to mean something.

"Thank you," she mumbled, suddenly feeling embarrassed for breaking down in front of a stranger.

"Any time. It must be difficult for someone as young as you to see conflict."

Winry's mind drifted back to Ed, and how he'd described other alchemy fights to her.

"Yeah," she agreed, a fresh wave of worry boiling up, "I don't know how he does it."

 

Back in Resembool, Pinako had taken Nina into town and gathered the ingredients for stew. She left out the onions and garlic, since she knew for a fact that dogs couldn't have those, but left most of the other ingredients. It didn't taste quite the same without them, but she was sure it would still taste good.

"Did they ever get you a new toy, Nina?" She'd asked at the checkstand. Nina shook her head- she'd been finding other ways to communicate since Pinako had announced that Winry's record for the Quiet Game was ten hours and she'd become determined to beat it.

"Well, why don't we stop by the toy store on the way home and fix that?"

Nina wagged her tail excitedly.

"Oh! You got a new dog," the woman observed, "And you're making stew again tonight? Isn't there any left from the other day?"

"No, dear. The ingredients never made it home. I'm surprised you haven't heard- Ed and Al visited, and some Alchemist attacked them in the park."

"That attack involved _your_ boys?" The clerk's hands flew to her mouth, "Oh, did they get out alright? And Winry, too? She stopped by the other day! She's not hurt is she?"

"Winry's fine. The boys are a little worse for ware, but everyone made it out alive. Their wounds will heal. Thank you for asking, though."

The other woman smiled. "That's good to hear, I suppose." She unlocked a little cabinet below the register and slid a small bottle of Gin to Pinako.

"On the house," she said with a wink, "Helps with the hardest times."

"Thank you, but I'm going off the stuff for a bit. Just 'till I can be sure things have blown over."

The clerk took the bottle back. "Rain check, then. Let me know if you need anything else, okay?"

"Thanks again."

After a stop to the toy store, they headed home. A brand-new stuffed dog rode home on Nina's back. About halfway home, she got bored of the Quiet Game and Pinako started up a round of I Spy in the countryside.

"I...Spy..." Nina looked around, then grinned a big, snaggle-toothed smile, "Something that beings...With G."

"Hmmm...." Pinako pretended to think very hard for a moment, then asked, "Could it be...Grass?" That was pretty much all there was this time of year.

"No." Nina surprised her. She tried 'The Ground' and 'Gate' and 'Garden' before giving up.

"Grandma," Nina told her with a cheery wag of her tail.

That was right- Winry had picked the same word when she was six or seven.

"Ohh," Pinako said, "I should have guessed!" She ruffled Nina's mane. "How would you like to help Grandma make stew tonight?"

By help, she mostly meant watch, but Nina was still very excited by the idea.


	11. Killing Time

It wasn't even dawn when Hawkeye went to pound on the boys' door.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming!" Roy managed to trip over both Hughes and Ed on the way to the door. He couldn't be bothered to care that was in his boxers and a tank. "It's still dark out, First Lieutenant."

"It's morning. It'll be easier to travel if we leave before it gets hot. Winry and I are ready to leave." She looked him up and down before adding, "You should shower before we go."

She was right on both accounts. He was absolutely filthy from the night before, and more importantly, once the heat hit, travel would be an absolute misery- especially for Ed. His exposed automail parts heating up could burn him very badly.

"Alright, alright. Give us fifteen minutes."

"I'll be back in ten."

Roy shut the door.

"Well, you heard her. Rise and shine, soldiers, we've got work to do."

Hughes made it to the bathroom first and took the whole ten minutes. The others had finished getting dressed, but still needed to wash up a bit before heading out.

"Well, that felt nice! Nothing like being clean to make you feel like a new man, ready to face the day!" 

Roy and Ed groaned. No amount of showers would make either of them morning people.

Roy ducked into the bathroom for his own shower just as another knock sounded. Hughes answered.

"Good morning, Miss Rockbell! We're running a little behind, but we'll be ready to go in just a couple minutes."

Winry smiled. "No hurry," she told him politely, though she was actually very eager to get on the road, "I just wanted to check on Ed's automail before we go."

"Sure thing! He's on the floor."

She stared at him for a moment. "Why?"

"I'm more comfortable down here," Ed lied.

Winry walked in and examined the room. Blankets and pillows lined the floor, and the bed looked almost freshly-made, aside from the little sheet nest Al was sitting on.

"Did all of you sleep on the floor last night?"

"No. Al got the bed and Armstrong got the chair." Ed was startled when Winry pulled him to his foot and slipped his sleeve off his bad shoulder.

"Your automail looks terrible," Winry fretted.

"Yeah, well it doesn't feel great, either, so let's just hurry up and get the parts to fix it."

 

Hawkeye knocked and Hughes let her in.

"Roy's just finishing up in the shower," he told her, "We'll be all set in no time flat."

"Perfect. While we wait, I've done some thinking, and splitting up may be our best option."

"How so?"

"Miss Rockbell and I could go into town to look for Ed's parts while you and Colonel Mustang visit the business closer to the train station and look for any sign of your family."

"What should we do?"

"Al asked."

"I think it would be best if the injured parties stayed here. We're already fairly conspicuous, and you three don't really help us to blend in. A limping mountain of a man, a talking armor head, and a scrapped State Alchemist would all stick out too much. Not to mention the terrain not being particularly forgiving, and likely too hard to travel in your condition."

"You want us to just wait here and do nothing?" Ed wasn't happy. "How are we supposed to help if we're stuck sitting around in this lousy hotel?"

"You'd be helping by laying low. None of you are in any condition to travel or fight."

"I've still got a good arm and a good leg!"

"Ed, I think she's right. It'd be easier and faster for them to get your parts if we waited here." Al hoped his brother would be reasonable.

"No way! I'm not some lazy jerk who's just gonna-" He got up too quickly and tangled his foot in the blankets. Winry managed to catch him before he toppled over into the nightstand.

"Ed, listen." She sat him back down and looked him in the eye like Hawkeye had done with her the night before, "It's one day. I'll get the parts I need today and work on them for as long as it takes to get you fixed. That's going to take longer if I have to haul you along the whole way, and it's going to be harder if you jiggle more parts loose or burn the nerves I need to connect to in the desert heat."

"But I-"

"I'm tired of seeing you in pieces. Don't make this harder than it needs to be."

Ed grit his teeth and weighed his options for a heavy moment before backing down.

"Alright. Just go as fast as you can, okay? And stick with Hawkeye."

"We'll be back tonight," Winry promised.

The bathroom door opened and Mustang emerged in a towel.

"Roy! There are _ladies_ present!" Hughes shoved him back and tried to slam the door.

"Well, tell them to get lost so I can get dressed! My clothes are all in the closet!"

Winry and Hawkeye stepped out for a moment while Mustang got dressed.

"Hey, I figured you three would probably be staying here, so I've got a job for you."  Roy pulled his coat on and reached into the pocket to retrieve a piece of paper.

"This is the address of the hotel and our room number. Hughes has it, too, and we're going to leave it at the information desk at the train station and show them a picture of the Hughes family. If anyone calls the room comes to the door to ask if you were expecting company, say yes."

"Good thinking." Armstrong limed over to take the paper. "I'll keep an eye out to see if your car passes on the street today."

"Thank you. We'll be back late, so don't wait up for us. There's a number for room service on the nightstand."

Roy stepped out with Hughes close on his heels. The father paused at the door and added over his shoulder,

"If you do see my wife and daughter, clean up before inviting them in!"

The door clicked shut and the three injured parties listened to four sets of footsteps fade down the carpeted hall.

 

"This sucks," Ed sighed, laying back on the bed. "What're we supposed to do all day? It's barely dawn and I know today's going to be boring and take forever."

Armstrong picked up the menu.

"Let's start with breakfast for you boys," he told him, "On me."

"Thanks, but I can't eat," Al reminded him.

"Well, not for real."

Armstrong's comeback baffled both Elric brothers. Twenty minutes later with a bacon and egg breakfast and a strawberry waffle, along with a coffee, two glasses of orange juice, and a milk.

"To wash the waffle down," Armstrong said.

"I hate milk."

"That's why you're so short," Al told him.

"Alphonse, would you like to share the bacon?"

"I already told you, I can't eat!"

"Well, you can pretend."

"How? And _why_?"

Armstrong placed Al's armor head over his own.

"Say 'ah,'" He instructed. Al humored him and opened the armor jaws. Armstrong fed the bacon through and ate it himself.

"Feel more normal?" He asked.

"No."

"You don't look normal, either," Ed told them.

"Well, it was worth a shot." Armstrong removed Al's head and set it back on the bed.

"Thanks for trying, I guess, but it's no the real thing."

 

Forty minutes later, the mess from breakfast had been removed and everyone was bored stiff.

"Hey, Al, open your mouth again."

"Why?"

"Just do it."

Ed was standing over by the closet, leaning on the wall.

Al did as he was instructed and Ed threw a sock as fast as he could, landing it in his brother's mouth.

"I can't believe it! It made it in!"

"Gross! Get it out!"

Armstrong plucked the sock from Al's mouth and rolled it into a ball.

"My turn," He announced before hurling it back at Ed, who tipped over to avoid it. It hit the door hard enough to rattle it. Impressive, for something that weighed next to nothing.

"Oh, it's _on!_ " 

The sock war was long and mighty, even with Ed stuck leaning on the wall and the Major remaining in the chair to keep off his bad knee. Al stepped in as the referee, keeping track of how many hits each person landed on the other and calling fowls for knocking over decorations or furniture (and one extra for Ed hitting him with the first sock.)

By the time they finished, the room was a mess. Socks were everywhere. At one point, Ed had run out of ammo and had thrown both of his pairs of gloves and a pillow. 

Al declared Armstrong the winner. He'd scored fewer hits (likely because he wasn't particularly invested in dodging), but had only two fowls as opposed to Ed's eleven. It was a miracle that nothing was broken.

"Yeah, fine. Good game." Ed looked around the room.

"We may have overdone it." The Major admitted.

"Who cares? Cleaning up will give us something to do, at least."

Ed slid carefully down the wall to his knee and began collecting socks. Armstrong followed suit.

"Wanna make it more interesting?" Al asked.

Of course they did.

Around noon, housekeeping opened the door and was surprised to find Ed and the Major with their legs tied together- Ed's good leg to the Major's bad leg- each trying to fold a blanket faster and neater than the other. Both were blindfolded, and Armstrong had one arm behind his back.

"Look for the corners, Brother! The corners!" Al was shouting.

"How the Hell are we supposed to fold the blankets one-handed? This is the stupidest game ever!"

"Don't give up, young Elric! We'll have this room tidy before you know it! I'll just have it tidy a little sooner than you."

"And why are we tied together, again?" Ed demanded.

"Because he's keeping you from falling over and you're helping to support the side with his bad knee." Al told him. Suddenly he noticed the poor employee, standing in the doorway with a bottle of spray cleaner and a rag.

"I'll come back later," He told them, closing the door.

After about five seconds of solid silence, the three burst out laughing.

"We can't tell anyone," Al announced, "Ever."

"Agreed." Ed let his blanket fall to the floor, giving up.

"My lips are sealed." Armstrong brought his arm back to the front and pulled off both blindfolds, then folded the blankets properly.

"So what time is it?" Al asked, "It must be getting pretty late, right?"

"Twelve fourteen." The Major tossed the folded blankets onto the bed while the boys let out exasperated groans.

"How is it only lunchtime?" Ed complained.

"Time is the worst!" Al agreed. They should be used to it from the long train rides, but even then, they could at least watch the scenery pass.

"Speaking of lunch, let's not order room service again. That was the same fellow who brought breakfast."

"Yeah. We're gonna have to figure something else out."

Armstrong limped over to the window, dragging Ed along with him, and peeked through the blinds. There was a deli across the street.

"I'm sure a quick walk across the street would be fine," he said, untying his leg, "I'll be back with something to eat in a few minutes."

 

At the Rush Valley Lunch Rush Deli, a young girl tugged on Armstrong's coat.

"Do you know my Daddy?" she asked, "He's in the military, too."

"Elicia, don't bother the poor man." A woman pulled the girl away, "I'm very sorry, Sir, she saw your coat and-"

Armstrong wasn't really listening. He was too shocked by the good fortune. They no longer had to be worried for the safety of Gracia and Elicia Hughes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry these are taking so long, everyone, and thank you for your patience and encouragement! Things are still kind of rough but it's not as bad as it was, so hopefully these will be coming out faster soon.


	12. Catching Up

"Hey, Brother, do you think Nina would still be able to enjoy a sock fight when we got back? She has no hands, but dodging them might still be fun."

"I dunno. We could try it, I guess. And once I get my limbs back, we can go into town and see about finding her a toy or something. We keep not doing that."

"What do little girls like?"

"Automail and tools, I think."

The door slammed open.

"Major, what kind of sandwiches did you get?" Ed didn't bother standing to meet him at the door.

"None. I left them at the shop."

"What the Hell, Major? You were gone for like half an hour and you didn't even bring the sandwiched back?"

"I found the Hughes."

Armstrong stood to the side and ushered Gracia and Elicia into the room.

"Ladies, these are the Elric Brothers."

"We've met," Gracia told him. "How have you boys been? How's Nina?"

"Uh," Ed's mind flashed to the fight with Scar, "Good."

"Where is she? I thought she was staying with you two from now on."

"We forgot her in Resembool." Al confessed guiltily.

"You _what_? She's a little girl! She can't fend for herself in-"

"We didn't leave her alone! She's with our friend's grandma. We can trust her. She basically raised us."

"I see. And what happened to you two? As I recall, you were each in one piece when you left. It's only been a couple of weeks and you're already hurt!"

"We're not hurt! I just need my automail back and then I'll fix Al. We're not kids anymore- we can take care of ourselves."

Gracia sighed and dropped the subject. Ed didn't get why she was so upset- it wasn't like she was _their_ mother or anything.

After a few moments of uncomfortable silence, Gracia spoke up again.

"This room is a mess."

"Well, five men are staying in it. I think we're doing a pretty good job, if you take that into consideration."

" _Five_?"

Armstrong jumped in. "As I said, your husband is here, too, along with Colonel Mustang."

"And you only got one bed?"

"They had a room with one and a room with two open. The girls got the one with two beds."

Armstrong then explained that Winry and Hawkeye were there, too, but had gone out to get the parts to repair Ed's automail and wouldn't be back until evening.

"You and Elicia will most likely be sharing a room with them tonight."

Gracia seemed to favor that option over trying to fit herself and her daughter into the already over-crowded room they were standing in.

"What about you, Mrs.Hughes? How have you and Elicia been faring? Are you okay?"

Gracia nodded.

"We've been doing alright. We had a brief scare where we thought we'd be caught by security at the train yard, though. We wanted to find an officer or something eventually, but not while we were stowing away."

"How'd you keep from getting caught?" Al asked.

"A strange man helped us."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter, but it's a double update today!


	13. A Mother's Will, Part 1

Gracia's heart sank when she felt the train begin to move. They were supposed to be parked for the night! She gently lay her sleeping daughter across the back seat of Mustang's car and opened the door, squeezing out between the boxes and climbing up until she could see through the cracks in the car's wood.

They were already going very quickly. Telephone poles flew past and the locomotive was gaining speed. It was too late for them to get off, not that jumping had ever really been an option.

Gracia crept back into the car and shut the door. She tried to figure out how fast they were going, thinking of how quickly the telephone poles had passed, but it was hard to say. All she could really be sure of was the fact that she was suddenly trapped alone with her young daughter, getting farther and farther from her husband as they barreled towards who-knew where.

She took a deep breath to calm herself. This wasn't the absolute worst-case scenario. She still had everything they'd packed and taken with, so she could still take fairly good care of Elicia. She shook their canteen, estimating that it was about half-full. She dug around and found Mustang's, too. He must have forgotten it. There wasn't much left- probably only about a fifth of its capacity- but it was something. She also had some money in her purse- not much, but enough for a night or two in a motel, and some food. But then, staying in a motel might not be the best option. She didn't know how quickly she'd be reunited with her husband, and she had to make the money last as long as possible until then.

The train began moving around a bend, it's loud, high-pitch breaks waking Elicia.

The girl rubbed her eyes and sat up.

"Mommy, are we moving again?"

"Yes, dear. You should go back to sleep so the trip goes faster."

The girl looked around. "Where are Daddy and Mr.Mustang?"

"They aren't back yet, Elicia. I don't know how long it'll be until we see them again, but I'm sure it won't take more than a few days." She hoped that she sounded more confident than she felt.

"Where are we going?"

"I don't know, dear."

"How long 'till we stop?"

"I don't know." She scooted closer and pulled her daughter into her lap, rubbing her back. "It's scary, and new, but we'll be okay, Elicia. Go back to sleep."

The train kept going for what felt like ages. Gracia felt the temperature rising in the car and wondered how long it would be before she had to make Elicia sit out on the boxes by the sides of the car to keep cool. She worried once more about their water ration. She was thirsty, but didn't want to drink anything yet. She had to save as much as she could for her daughter.

Finally, the mid-afternoon heat was too much. Gracia wiped the sweat from her brow and woke Elicia.

"Mommy, it's hot," the child complained.

"I know. Let's go sit where the wind can reach us."

"I'm thirsty."

Gracia held the two canteens for a moment, then opened the lighter one. She tipped it back for Elicia and let her drink about half of what was left, then pulled it away.

"I'm still thirsty," Elicia complained.

"I'm sorry, Elicia. We don't have much water left, and we have to save it. You can have some more in a little bit, okay?"

It was only a little cooler by the sides. Even the breeze was hot. Gracia looked outside and saw that the seas of grass had turned into seas of sand and parched stone, white in the sun.

The trip dragged on. Elicia was bored and Gracia was anxious. They finished Mustang's canteen and started on her husband's. Gracia prayed that the train would stop soon.

The sun got lower, bathing the valley in red light. It had finally cooled off a little bit, and the two went to sit in the car again. The windows were all down but it still felt stuffy. It couldn't be helped. The whole boxcar had felt stuffy since the heat had hit.

Elicia was asleep again. Gracia watched her chest rise and fall. She was exhausted, too. She leaned back and rested her head against the door. She just needed to close her eyes for a few minutes.

It only felt like seconds before Elicia's screaming woke her. It was pitch black, and for a moment Gracia couldn't remember where they were- then it all flooded back, and she realized that they were no longer moving.

"Elicia," she soothed, pulling her sobbing daughter closer, "What is it? We stopped. The train stopped. We can get off now."

"It's dark," The child whimpered, "And I had a bad dream."

"What happened in your dream?"

"I was sitting in the bathtub and the drain stopper went away and I went down the drain," she was still crying very hard.

"Well, you're not in the bathtub right now. And you know you're too big to go down the drain, so you don't have to be afraid next time you take a bath."

"But it was scary."

"Yes, I'm sure it was very scary. But it's over now, and there's no need to be afraid anymore."

"But I _am_ afraid. And it's _dark_."

Gracia hugged her closer.

"That's okay. We can just take a moment to be afraid. Sometimes you just have to do that."

She hugged Elicia close until the girl's crying quieted.

"Feeling better?"

The girl nodded.

"Good. Let's get off the train now and see where we are."

They made their way back over the boxes. Gracia tried to slide the door open, but it was stuck, or rather, locked from the outside. She cursed under her breath and looked around. Maybe there was a loose board, or something she could use to pry the lock open.

She noticed a few silver beams of moonlight coming through a hatch in the ceiling. 

"Wait here," She told Elicia. She clambered over the crates and boxes and fiddled with the latch in the dark. Finally, it came loose. She propped it open and climbed back down for Elicia, and a few necessities.

When she made it back to the top, she pushed Elicia through first.

"Don't move until I get up there with you," she instructed, "We're going to be very high up."

She hauled herself up next to her daughter and closed the hatch behind them. She had a diaper bag with the canteens, her purse, a first aid kit, and a couple changes of clothes, plus Elicia's favorite toy. She'd left a lot behind in the car, but she wanted to pack light for now. She didn't know how far they'd have to walk.

She climbed down the side of the train with Elicia in one arm, jumping down the last couple of feet to the rocks below. They were definitely in another train yard. Cars were parked all around them on the tracks. She saw a flashlight beam slice through the dark just a couple cars ahead of them and backed up.

"Mommy, what was-"

"Shh," she instructed sharply, covering her daughter's mouth.

"I heard something over by number forty-eight," A man's voice said, "Let the dogs off."

Gracia's heart skipped a beat as a flurry of barks tore through the silence. She took off running in the opposite direction, trying not to stumble on the loose, jagged stones. She was exhausted and dehydrated, and the bag was heavy. Elicia was crying again, and she could feel hot tears and snot on her palm as she struggled to keep her quiet.

She could hear the dogs getting closer, and behind them, the security guards. She searched desperately for a place to hide, but all she could see was more train cars. She wondered for a moment if she could make it up a ladder with Elicia before a dog grabbed her, but judging from the sound of scattering rocks and excited yips, they were right on her heels.

She veered off to her right, jumping over a coupling and squeezing between the cars. She kept following the car and found herself face-to-face with a brick wall.

The dogs had cornered them. The four large beasts move in slowly, looking for an opportunity to strike. Gracia jumped as high as she could, catching the edge of her wall and sitting Elicia on top before one of the dogs grabbed the hem of her skirt and pulled her down.

"Mommy!" Elicia wailed as Gracia struck it across the head with her purse. It let go with a yelp and jumped back, but immediately fell back in with the others. Gracia couldn't hear the men anymore- she must have lost them jumping the coupling. They weren't going to call the dogs off. She scrambled to her feet and prepared to fight them back for as long as she could. 

"Stay there, Elicia," She yelled, no longer concerned about her volume.

The dogs lunged in. She grabbed one by the collar, holding it back, and hit another with her purse. A third grabbed hold of her skirt again, and when the fourth jumped forward, she thought it was over.

There was a flash of motion in the corner of her eye- a tall figure in a tan trench coat kicked the lunging animal back and pulled the other off of Gracia's skirt.

"Jump over," he ordered, sparks dancing between his fingers as he grabbed the third dog by the collar, pulling it from Gracia's hands and hurling it away.

Gracia scrambled up the wall and grabbed her daughter, jumping down the other side. The stranger followed quickly and grabbed her arm, pulling her along the wall until they reached an alleyway, then ducking inside.

"Thank you," Gracia panted, stroking Elicia's head and hugging her close, "Thank you so much, I thought we were-"

"It's nothing."

The man was holding his arm. Gracia noticed  that it was bleeding- it looked like a dog had bitten him. It was a terribly large wound. She hadn't realized how large the dogs' jaws must have been.

"They got you!" She fretted, rooting around in her bag until she found the first aid kit, "I'm so sorry. Here, let me wrap that for you."

"It's an old wound," The man told her, "It's fine."

Gracia shook her head.

"It's open. We should wrap it."

She reached for the man's arm and he pulled away.

"Later," he said, "First, we have to find somewhere safe for the night. Follow me."

Not sure of what else to do, Gracia trailed after the stranger as they sought refuge in the dark.


	14. A Mother's Will, Part 2

It took nearly forty minutes for them to find a place that was well-hidden but still suitable to sleep. Gracia was exhausted, and the man's wound had long since stopped bleeding on its own. When they finally sat down, it was behind a pile of crates and barrels in the back of an alleyway. A tarp had been thrown over the top to keep them dry, and it didn't look like they'd been disturbed in quite some time. It was doubtful that they'd be bothered there for the night, but it was far from preferable conditions. After all, how comfortable would any mother be sleeping outside with her child, hidden away with a stranger? However, she was exhausted, thoroughly lost, and the man had saved them. It was only for one night.

"Let me see your arm," Gracia said softly, trying not to wake Elicia as she set her down.

The man hesitantly extended his arm and Gracia took a look. It was an old wound, alright, and it looked like it was already becoming infected. She had a small bottle of hydrogen peroxide in the kit, and she used all of it on his arm, watching it fizz away and dribble down to the cobblestone below, staining it red. She cleaned it the rest of the way with a handkerchief and wrapped it.

"You have to change the bandages more often," she warned, "And clean the wound so it doesn't get infected."

The man grunted in response, and she doubted that he was taking it to heart.

"Thank you again, by the way. I'm Gracia- Gracia Hughes."

"It's fine."

His social skills were nearly non-existent.

"What may I call you, Sir?"

He was quiet for a moment.

"I don't really have a name," he told her.

Well, that was nonsense, as well as a big red flag.

"A nickname, then?"

"Scar." He didn't look very happy with himself for answering like that. It seemed to have just slipped out.

"Well, Scar, it was very kind of you to help us tonight. We'll be out of your hair first thing in the morning."

"Do you know where you're going?"

Gracia fell silent.

"Do you know where you are right now?" Scar prompted.

Gracia shook her head. She hadn't really looked around much after getting on the train.

"Ever been to Rush Valley before?"

No.

"I'm sure it won't be a problem. I just have to find a way to contact my husband, and I'll only be here a short time."

Scar thought about this, then nodded.

"I can take you into the main town tomorrow. I'm sure somebody will lend you a phone."

 _Hopefully it'll be that simple_ , Gracia thought.

"Get some rest if you can," Scar instructed, "We'll be leaving before dawn to beat the heat."

Gracia nodded and leaned her head against the wall, pulling Elicia into her arms. She had no intention of sleeping, though. Not in this strange town with this strange man and her daughter, huddled like rats in an alleyway.

The hours crawled past like worms on a hot sidewalk- slowly, slowly, until time didn't seem to be moving at all. The temperature had dropped drastically, and Gracia cursed herself for not bringing any blankets. She rummaged around in the diaper bag until she found one of Elicia's sweaters and draped it over the sleeping girl, hoping it would help to fight the cold.

Scar was asleep. She could tell by his rhythmic breathing. He didn't snore like her husband did, though. He sat in almost deathly silence, arms crossed and head resting awkwardly against the wall.

Gracia missed the snoring. She missed Maes' arms around her on cold nights and his goofy smile wishing her goodnight before she turned off the light. She really did hope to see him again soon.

Finally, Scar jerked awake. He rubbed his eyes and turned to see Gracia already up.

"It's time to go," he told her, though she had no idea how he knew what time it was. It still felt like the middle of the night to her. Still, she nodded and grabbed the diaper bag before following him out between the crates.

"Not to be rude, but you should clean up some before we get to town," he told her as they got back out onto the street proper. She caught a glimpse of herself in a dark window- messy, greasy hair from the train ride, covered in dirt, and the hem of her skirt was torn where the dog had gotten it. Elicia was dusty, too, though being carried had spared her from quite a bit of the grime. A hot wave of embarassment washed over Gracia as she ran her fingers through her hair in an attempt to brush it. She had another handkerchief in the bag and dribbled some water from the canteen on it to wipe herself and Gracia down with. Scar, remembering the other, wiped his own face down with the corner that wasn't caked in dry blood.

"Here," he took off his trench coat. Miraculously, it still looked fairly clean. Probably because the dust didn't show up well on its color.

"Oh, I couldn't-"

"You'll stick out like a sore thumb if people see your clothes ripped up. I'm assuming you and I are both trying to stay under the radar, since we were hiding on trains."

He had a point. Someone from the military was out to get her husband, and the last thing she needed was to be recognized, however unlikely, and taken hostage to be used against him.

She took the coat and did her best to make it look like it fit. It was too big in the shoulders, and so long that it almost touched the ground as she walked. She felt something in the right pocket and paused to pull it out.

"Sunglasses?"

Scar took them from her and put them on, despite it still being pitch black out.

"I have sensitive eyes." He told her. Somehow she doubted that being the actual reason. She suddenly wished the sun would rise faster so that she could see his face properly.

It was a long walk, and by the time they reached town the sun was peaking over the horizon. It was getting hot again.

"The shops should be open soon," Scar told her, "You should find a place to wait out the heat of the day."

"Where are you going?" Gracia hoped her question wasn't too intrusive.

"I have to stock up on supplies. If you'd like, we can meet back here around noon."

Gracia hesitated, then nodded. "Alright. I'll find somewhere for us to keep cool in the meantime."

She didn't know him well, but right now Scar was sort of a lifeline while she tried to find her husband. At the very least, he seemed to know how to fight if anybody bothered her, and seemingly had no ill will toward her or Elicia.

 _Maybe we could help each other_ , Gracia thought, _Since we're both on the run. Once I find Maes, he should join our party._

She bought some cheap sweetrolls for breakfast at the bakery, filling the canteens at a water fountain in the front.

"I'm sorry, but do you have a phone I could borrow?" She asked the woman behind the counter.

"Unfortunately, not today. I'm sorry. Someone broke the line the other day messin' around in the back and we haven't had time to fix it. Your best bet's gonna be to wait until the deli a few doors down opens. Johnny doesn't mind lettin' folks borrow the phone. Otherwise, you could always use the payphone out by the hotel across the street from there, if it's not too hot to touch."

"Thank you."

Perfect. She knew where a phone was. Better yet, there was a hotel. If she could contact her husband, she wouldn't have to make Elicia spend another night in an alleyway.

Time marched by and it got hot. Gracia ordered a glass of iced tea and nursed it slowly, playing with Elicia while she waited for noon to draw nearer.

Finally, she left the bakery and made a beeline for the Rush Valley Lunch Rush Deli. She ordered two of the cheapest sandwiches they had-chicken salad-and sat Elicia down at a table with half of one.

"Wait here for just a minute," she told her daughter, "I'll be right back. Eat before it gets warm."

She asked the man who took their order if there was a phone they could borrow, and she found herself watching Elicia from a little table in the back between the bathroom doors.

She wasn't sure what number to dial. Where could they be? A hotel in Resembool? No, she doubted that. Too much risk of being seen. What was the name of the family friend the Elircs were staying with? Maybe they were staying with her. Gracia wracked her brain until she remembered. The boys had mentioned her name a time or two when they'd stayed over.

 _Rockbell. Winry Rockbell_ , she thought.

She flipped through the dusty old phone book until she found the R's.

ROCKBELL, PINAKO....

ROCKBELL, WINRY....

Both were listed under the same phone number. Drawing in a breath, Gracia dialed the phone. It rung once. Twice. She glanced over her shoulder to check Elicia. 

"Hello, Rockbell residence," And old woman's voice answered.

Gracia panicked for a moment as she caught sight of a very large man in a military uniform limping in. She turned quickly.

"Hello, Miss Rockbell? My name is Gracia Hughes. My husband is a friend of the Elric brothers, and I was wondering if you might know where he is?"

"Hughes? Oh, dear, I'm afraid the boys set out and they're all somewhere in Rush Valley looking for you."

"Would you happen to know where they're staying?"

"I have the number here somewhere, just give me a minute."

"Do you know my Daddy?" Gracia's heart stopped as she caught sight of Elicia tugging on the officer's coat.

"I'm sorry, I'll call you back." She wasn't even sure if Ms.Rockbell heard her as she slammed the phone down and raced over to her daughter.

"Elicia, don't bother the poor man," She struggled to remain calm as she raised her head, faking a sheepish smile.

"I'm very sorry, Sir, she saw your coat and must have assumed. My husband is in the military, too, and we-" She got a better look at the officer's face. It was unmistakable. The hair, the mustache, the build like a mountain.

"Mrs.Hughes?" Armstrong asked.

"Major Armstrong!" Gracia's heart was racing. He recognized her. Was he on their side?

"Oh, I'm so happy to see you safe!" He boomed, tears flowing from his eyes. He was making a scene.

"Major Armstrong, your voice-" Gracia put a finger to her lips.

"Oh! Sorry. But you must come with me," he told her, "Your husband and Colonel Mustang will be back this evening. It will be a wonderful reunion! Oh, poor Hughes has been worried sick!"

Gracia quickly wrapped the sandwiches back up and tossed them in the diaper bag. She'd intended to give one to Scar, but she'd forgotten about him in the moment of glee. She'd be reunited with her husband!

 

Half an hour later, she was sitting in the boys' hotel room. They didn't have a key for the girls' room next door. 

"Sorry about that, Mrs.Hughes," Alphonse said, "I'm sure they'll be back soon. Until then, could you tell us more about how you got here? It sounds like it was an adventure."

"Yeah, and where'd you get that huge coat?" Ed asked, eyeing it suspiciously.

Coat? The coat! _Scar's_ coat! She'd forgotten about Scar!

"What time is it?"

"Huh?"

"What time is it?" She demanded, praying that it wasn't too far past noon.

"Five past twelve," Armstrong stammered, "Is everything okay?"

"I'm meeting the man who helped us. You should come with- I'd like for him to join our group."

"Alright," Ed said, "I just need a few minutes to-"

"I'm sorry, Ed, but maybe not this trip. I'm afraid we'll miss him."

"Oh. Okay." Ed flopped down on the bed.

"Could you and Al keep an eye on Elicia for me?"

"Yep."

Armstrong followed her out the door as fast as he could, which was rather fast for a man with a limp, but not tremendously fast overall.

Gracia had her purse and the sandwich. She led Armstrong back to the spot by the bakery, where Scar was waiting. Upon seeing the blue uniform, he jumped to his feet.

"It's okay! He's a friend of my husband's," Gracia explained, offering him the sandwich, "I met him at the deli. We're going to be traveling together- you should come with us. Everyone should be back tonight. Maybe you could join our group? It would be easier than traveling alone."

She suddenly noticed the uncomfortable energy in the staredown between Scar and Armstrong.

"Well," Armstrong said, arms drawn up a little defensively, mirroring Scar, "This is rather uncomfortable. I'd like to say a friend of Mrs.Hughes is a friend of mine, but..."

Scar glanced at the Major's leg and his own arm. He remembered the fight in the park, and the damage he'd caused, and his promise to the blonde girl.

"...I'm not interested in a fight," He told the Major carefully, "I've been re-evaluating some decisions since that day in Resembool."

Hesitantly, Armstrong offered his and, and Scar shook it.

"Let's let bygones be bygones," The Major said, "But don't get any ideas."

"I won't."

Gracia wasn't comfortable with the hostile greeting, but she didn't want to pry. The last thing any of them needed was to cause a scene.

"We'll head back to the hotel room now," Armstrong told them, "It's too hot to stand around outside. Let me go in first, to warn the boys that we have a visitor."

 

It was quiet all the way back to the room.

Armstrong pushed the door open.

"Hey, so did you catch the guy in time? I want to thank him. Elicia told us about the dogs." Ed was watching Elicia play with the strands of hair coming from Al's helmet.

"Yes, we did. As it so happens, he might be joining us for our travels."

"Oh? Where is he?"

"He's here. I just didn't want to surprise you too much. He's an ally now, after all."

Ed glanced at Al.

"Why does it sound like we know this guy and already don't like him?" Al asked.

"Surprise," Armstrong said weakly, waving jazz hands about as he stepped farther inside and Scar followed.

"What the fuck, Major?!"

Elicia went dead silent.

"What's a fuck?"

"Don't say that," Al told her, "But really," He snapped, turning his attention to the Major, "What the Hell?! He tried to kill us like, earlier this week!"

"My bad," Scar muttered unhelpfully.

Gracia plopped down on the bed, putting her hands over Elicia's ears.

"One of you. _Any_ of you. Explain. _Now_."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for being so patient and encouraging. ;v;
> 
> This story's going to keep going but honestly I don't know how fast. It's going to get more light-hearted soon.


	15. Girls' Night Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know canon has already been falling off the track but at this point it's going to be shoved off the bridge into turbulent waters.
> 
> 'Scooby-Doo inspired" might not even be enough to cover what's coming, honestly.
> 
> As for the update schedule I am. So sorry.

"The boys are going to be so worried about us," Riza said, realizing how late it was.  
  
"I hope they've at least found the Hughes so they don't go looking for all four of us," Winry agreed. The two of them had run into some trouble in town when Paninya, a young lady with fascinating automail, had failed to swipe Riza's wallet. She'd been discreetly on the lookout for military personnel tailing them. Paninya was good, but her catlike stealthiness and sticky fingers were no match for the sniper's keen eye. She was caught in an instant and thrown to the floor. Winry, upon catching a glance at her fabulous automail, fell in love with the design and insisted that they let the other girl go so long as she was allowed to take a look.  
  
"Besides," She added quietly to a hesitant Hawkeye, "What are we going to do? Go to the military police while we're on the lam?"  
  
With it being as hot as it was, and so close to lunchtime, Paninya invited the two ladies over for refreshments with her adoptive family and a look around the shop. One thing led to another as they all told stories over lemonade, talked about automail, and generally just relaxed for the first time in several days. They were so happy to be relaxed, in fact, that they ignored how late it was getting until it was too close to dark to go, and even if they'd wanted to, a storm blew in and trapped them for the night.  
  
"Maybe we should just try our luck with the storm," Winry mused as she fiddled with the phone, hoping she could tinker it into working despite the storm being the obvious cause of its breaking.  
  
Riza, being the tough bird she was, was willing to consider it- that is, until one of their gracious hosts went into labor. Dominic hurried out into the storm to fetch a doctor, but there was no waiting. The baby was on its way.

"Ms. hawkeye, do you have any experience with this sort of thing?" Paninya asked, fretting over a very-much-in-labor Satella.  
  
"No," She said, her tongue betraying her in the heat of the moment, "I was trained as a sniper, not a medic."  
  
"My parents were doctors," Winry interjected, "I've read a bunch of books. I know what to do, but I'm going to need some help-and some supplies."  
  
"Name it," Paninya said, wincing as Satella let out an agonized screech.  
  
"Hot water, towels, scissors, something to sanitize them with for starters."  
  
The hot water took longest, but better late than never. The labor took what seemed like ages. Hawkeye helped to keep Satella calm, the same way she'd done for wounded comrades in the war. Paninya and Ridel did the back-and-forth supply fetching since they knew where everything was, and Winry worked on the delivery itself.   
  
Partway through the crowning, Ridel had to take a seat-the blood had him feeling faint. Even still, he never let go of his wife's hand unless Winry sent him out for something. On one of the lst runs of the evening, he managed to dump the hot water bucket, slip, and knock himself out. The whole episode added to the disaster that was the birthing process, but Paninya cleaned it up and hauled him out to the hallway. The doctor could examine him once he was done with Satella and the baby.  
  
Finally, a loud cry broke through the house. Winry cut and tied the umbilical, washed and dried the newborn, wrapped it up, and handed him to his exhausted new mother.   
  
"It's a boy," She said.  
  
"He's so small," Paninya remarked, watching him reach with tiny, plump fingers for his mother.  
  
"What are you going to name him?" Riza asked.  
  
"I'm too tired to think," She said, "I talked about it with my husband. I can't remember which we picked for a boy, but we'll get it figured out once the doctor gets here and he wakes up."  
  
"That's fair."  
  
Winry ushered everyone out of the room. They took shifts watching Satella and Ridel until Dominic returned with the doctor a few hours later.  
  
Safely relieved from duty, the grils flopped down side-by-side on the couch and slept nearly until noon.  
  
"Rise and shine, Rockbell. Phones are still down, the baby's doing well, and I'm sure the boys are going to kill us for staying out this long."  
  
They quickly got ready, refilled their canteens, and thanked the portion of their hosts that weren't huddled away with the doctor in the bedroom.  
  
"Do you have to go so soon?" Paninya asked, "You're welcome to stay a little longer."  
  
"Don't bother 'em. They've got places to be and we've got family matters to attend to," Dominic said. He turned to Winry, placed a hand on her shoulder, and thanked her.  
  
"One more thing before you go, young lady: Thank you. I'm afraid today might have been a funeral instead of a birthday if it wasn't for you. I still don't take apprentices, but if you want to learn, I know a damn good mechanic who could use a hand in the shop. Also, I wanted to ask you if the by's bellybutton was always gonna be that damn ugly."  
  
  
It was an exhausting journey back to the hotel.  
  
"Oh, I can't wait to get back and take a shower," Winry told Riza, "And never be surprised by anything ever again."  
  
"I don't know. As far as surprises go, that one turned out alright. Maybe, if we're lucky, karma will keep that good luck rolling our way and we'll find the Hughes."  
  
"Oh, if only."  
  
The two dragged themselves up the steps and unlocked their room. There, on Winry's bed, were Gracia and Elicia Hughes.  
  
"I can't believe that worked," Winry gasped. Riza raced forward to greet the family- she knew Gracia fairly well. They'd been in touch since Roy and Maes were such good friends.  
  
"It's good to see you," Riza said, "We were so worried! How are you and Elicia doing? How long ago did you get back? Have you eaten?"  
  
"I could ask you the same! I sat up with Maes and the others waiting for you and Winry to get back last night. What happened? Are you alright?"  
  
"Oh, you wouldn't believe what we went through. Winry completely saved the day last night."  
  
Mustang knocked on the still-open door, then strolled in.  
  
"You could give us a call next time so we don't wait up," He told Hawkeye impatiently.  
  
"You could have slept through the wait to make it go faster like you do when you should be working," His friend countered. He'd missed her.  
  
"I'll go let everyone know you're back. Actually, we've got a surprise for you."  
  
"What kind of surprise?"  
  
"The kind with red eyes, tattoos and an apology to make. If all goes well, it'll become a member of our little caravan. Follow me over to the next room and you can meet him. You too, Winry."  
  
Riza prayed she was wrong about what the surprise was, but she knew the description too well to be wrong. She made sure to stay in front of Winry as the girl fell in numbly behind her. Clearly, she, too, had guessed what was waiting in the next room.  
  
  



	16. The Government Always Knows What It's Doing

Fuhrer Bradley sat at his desk, phone up to his ear. It rang twice. Three times. Someone answered.  
  
"What do you want, Wrath?"  
  
"Hello, Father. Just checking in."  
  
"How are things going with the three sacrifices you found?"  
  
"I have no idea where any of them are right now and also I gave them the dog girl."  
  
"You lost them? How do you lose three state alchemists?"  
  
"The total number of people unaccounted for is actually eight. Major Alexander Armstrong, Maes Hughes and his family, and First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye, went missing around the same time as Mustang and the Elric brothers."  
  
"You lost eight people? And Maes Hughes is still alive?"  
  
"Yes. Envy failed the assassination, and all of those persons immediately went missing. Did Envy not tell you about the failed mission?"  
  
"Hasn't been home since. I assumed his silence meant success."  
  
"In that case, nine people are missing, including Envy. How would you like for me to proceed with this, Father?"  
  
"Find them, of course! Put the sacrifices as top priority. We'll figure Envy out later."  
  
"Yes, Sir."  
  
Father hung up without saying goodbye.  
  
Rude, Bradley thought as he called in an assistant.  
  
"Furher Bradley, Sir?"  
  
"Hello, Elaine. I'd like for you to look up how things are going on the missing officer cases for Maes Hughes, Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye, and the Elric Brothers. Has anyone gotten into contact with their friends or family yet?"  
  
"As it happens, Second Lieutenant Maria Ross and her partner, Denny Brosh, talked to the Elric brothers and Major Armstrong just a few days ago about an indecent with the criminal Scar in Resembool."  
  
"Are they still there?"  
  
"We sent someone to check, but everyone said they left their new dog with an elderly family friend and left rather quickly. Town chatter says that the elder brother's automail was damaged, so it's likely that they've gone somewhere to get it repaired."  
  
"Have they reported in?"  
  
"Not since their talk with Ross and Brosh, Sir."  
  
Bradley mulled things over for a moment, then picked up the phone.  
  
"I'm going to call Mustang's team and see if they know anything. Please send Maria Ross and Denny Brosh to my office as soon as possible. I'm putting them on the case."  
  
As the phones rang and Mustang's team all answered, each confirming once again that the Colonel hadn't checked in, and that none of them knew where he or Hawkeye had gone, a few things swam through Bradley's head.  
  
Firstly, he'd told the Elric brothers to keep a close eye on the chimera, and the first thing they'd done was get into a fight with a dangerous criminal and leave it with some old lady as they dropped off the radar. When he found them, he was going to have to figure out a way to reprimand them sternly enough that they'd knew he meant business without actually killing the chimera and losing his bargaining chip, along with the Elric brothers' already shaky allegiance to the government. Perhaps he'd take that family friend into custody for possessing it, and telling them that she'd have a trial, but they should watch themselves-and the chimera-in the meantime. Say he'd work on getting her released as soon as possible for such silly accusations, so long as he didn't stop hearing from them and forget the matter. Old age does that to you, he could say.  
  
Secondly, he wondered if the disappearances were all connected, really. Colonel Mustang and Riza Hawkeye had absolutely gone missing with the Hughes family after the assassination attempt- that much, he was sure of. However, from what he'd seen, the Colonel and Edward Elric didn't get along particularly well, or see each other very often. It was possible that the Elrics were just doing their usual poor job of reporting in, and they'd surface on their own.  
  
He sat second-guessing himself, trying to figure out what the most likely path these emotion-driven humans would take was. It was agonizing, trying to figure it out. Why did humans have to bend to the will of their pathetic hearts so easily?  
  
Hearts. Perhaps he was wrong. His wife had given him some rather unconventional reading material lately-romance novels, to try and show him what she was talking about when she said she wished she could see his soft side more often.   
  
One of them was about a pair of idiot lovebirds who had run away from everything they'd known to start a new life together by the sea. He thought about First Lieutenant Hawkeye and Colonel Mustang. They'd always struck him as a couple of sorts. He wondered if, perhaps, by some bizarre set of circumstances, his gut feeling about all of these missing persons cases could be completely wrong, if the timelines just seemed so close that he'd jumped the gun and made assumptions too soon.   
  
Maybe the Elric brothers would report in, as usual, with the injured Major in tow. The Hughes family might eventually be discovered, years later, hiding out somewhere rural, trying to find a relatively normal way of life in Xing or something. Maybe the two fleeing lovebirds would never be discovered, wherever they'd gone, and-  
  
Someone knocked on his door and entered.  
  
"Sir, they're all traveling together. Maria Ross pulled their bank records, and they've all made purchases in Resembool and Rush Valley. We believe they're all staying in the same hotel."  
  
"Excellent work. Thank you for the update- keep on their tracks."  
  
He cursed himself for letting his imagination get the better of him. At least he knew where the sacrifices were. Now he could focus on finding his idiot brother.


	17. Decisions

"No." Winry said harshly after Scar had finished his long, uncomfortable half-apology, half-life story.

"C'mon, Winry, he saved the Hughes family!" Ed protested.

"He tried to kill you, Al, and the Major just a few days ago!"

"He said he was sorry," Al chipped in, "And I really think he is. Besides, he has experience being on the run. We could use his help. It won't be easy to hide with such a large party, you know."

He had a point. Winry knew that the criminal's experience could prove helpful, and he'd displayed at least a shred of morality by saving the Hughes, but she still couldn't shake the suspicion that he was up to something.  
  
"Look, if he was going to kill anyone, he would have done it last night while they were injured and sleeping." Hughes added, "Well, not me-I was in the next room over with my gorgeous family. Couldn't stand another night without them!" Tears formed in the corners of his eyes as he wrapped up the sentence.

"Yeah, he would've done us in half an hour after we agreed he could take the first watch to see if you got back. We were out like lights, except Al." Ed gestured to the sloppy blankets scatted across the floor. "Actually, if we'd been smarter about it, Al should've just taken all the watches," he mused, "Since he doesn't sleep."

"They're right- if I was going to try to kill your friends, I would have done it last night when there was only one exit and one person who wasn't injured in the room."

Scar's words didn't reassure the blonde at all.

"I can't believe you all! Why would you sleep with a murderer in the room?"

"Why not? Not like I can defend myself any better when I'm awake without my automail." Ed said flatly.

"It's not like my hands are clean, either," Mustang added, "And since I'm now a criminal to boot, who am I to judge?"

"I've also hurt people," Armstrong agreed, "And besides, any friend of the Hughes family is a friend of mine."

All eyes were on Winry. Somehow, it seemed that she would be the deciding factor despite how clear it was that everybody else had already made up their minds. She grit her teeth and tried to think hard about what the least-risky move would be.

She didn't want to outright reject him in the hotel room, full of her injured and exhausted friends and right next door to the helpless Hughes family, in case that made him snap and go after them again, but she also hated the idea of him being around anyone she cared about for any period of time.

They were all criminals of the state, on the lam, and likely being sought out by the government at that very moment. Some of them had experience tracking criminals, which would prove useful in dodging the military police, but only Scar was experienced at remaining hidden for long periods of time.

Worst of all, she knew that most of them weren't in any shape to fight. That meant it would be difficult to protect themselves against him, but it also made his combat strength incredibly important to the team in case something did go wrong and they encountered a strong enemy before they were done recuperating.

No matter how much she hated to admit it, Scar was a valuable asset to the team. She was going to have to put her emotions aside for now and do what she knew was best, but she quietly vowed to herself that she'd watch him constantly.

"Fine." She forced the words from her throat, making no attempt to hide the displeasure behind them as they left her lips, "He can stay. But I don't trust him." She made eye contact with her parents' murderer. "Remember your promise." 

With that, she shoved her way out of the room and into the hallway, headed for the stairs.  
  
"Where are you going?" Al called after her.  
  
"For a walk!" She didn't care if they heard or not. She needed some air.

"What a mess," Mustang observed. 

"Shut up. It went better than I'd expected. It's not like you can blame her, anyway." Ed defended. "The guy killed her parents."

Scar shifted uncomfortably in his spot.

"...Even if he's better now," Al finished for him, trying to lighten the blow, "It'll take some time for her to trust him. You'll have to earn it, Mr.Scar."

"That goes for all of us," Mustang told him sternly, "So let's start by brainstorming ways to keep us under the radar and out of jail. We're going to want to stick together and avoid the government as much as possible, for starters. Any advice you'd like to add, as a seasoned criminal-in-hiding?"

"Yes," the Ishvalan man said, "I think you should split up into smaller groups and maintain contact with the government."

"Great to see that we're all starting off in agreement," Ed said sarcastically.

"Hiding this many people is nearly impossible," Scar elaborated, ignoring Ed's snide remark, "And, as I understand it, the only ones who really need to be on the run are the Hughes family, Hawkeye, and Mustang. The government wants Hughes dead and it's clear that those two have allied themselves with him. However, the Elric brothers, Major Armstrong, and Winry have no reason to be fugitives. If they continue to check in, they can pretend to know nothing of what's going on with the rest of you and provide whatever information they catch onto about search efforts, plus help us to secure additional funds and supplies when they can."

He wasn't wrong, they realized.

"What do you think, Lieutenant?" Mustang asked, "Could it work?"

Hawkeye mulled the plan over for a little bit.

"It might be the best way to go about things," She said at last," Smaller groups are easier to manage, and since you and Ed never got along, it would make sense for him not to have had any contact with you. Plus, since he wasn't around, there's no reason for him to know about the Hughes incident or our disappearance. If he called to check in now, it would probably be chalked up to a combination of him being bad at that in general and injured on top of things. Moreover, he could go back to taking care of Nina."

With everything going on, Ed had almost forgotten about forgetting Nina back in Resembool.

"Sounds like we've got ourselves a plan," He said. Al sided with his brother, and Hughes agreed on the condition that he wouldn't be separated from his family again.

"Excellent. The lieutenant and I will work with Scar to figure out communication points and places for us to hide out. Ed, you check in like normal. Say you're in Rush Valley and that your automail mechanic is with you for repairs, and let them know you'll be back on track as soon as she's done. I'm going to call an old friend on the payphone outside and see about getting the rest of us some new identities."

They finally had a plan worked out, and Ed could continue his research into getting his, Al's, and Nina's old bodies back. Things were finally beginning to feel less complicated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear this isn't abandoned and I appreciate the support so much ;^;
> 
> Updates are still not going to be steady or frequent but they'll be coming!


	18. Lying to Public Officials

Ed dialed the number and did his best to focus on the frustration that had been pent up within him the last several days, channeling it all into his voice.

"Military Police Headquarters in Central. State your name, rank, and the reason for your call."

"Edward Elric, State Alchemist. Checking in late."

"As usual, Mr.Elric. I'll transfer you to a superior officer. One moment please."

Ed was expecting another Colonel, like Mustang, but instead, Fuhrer Bradley's voice assaulted his eardrums.

"About time you checked in, Fullmetal. I was starting to think maybe you'd gone AWOL."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Next time," Ed muttered, hoping he sounded convincingly irritable, "Last time I checked, checking in late wasn't exactly the kind of offense that would warrant a scolding from you. Everything alright back in Central? Me, Al, and the Major are pretty out of the loop here. We haven't been getting our mail. You know we're in Rush Valley, not Resembool anymore, right?"

"I don't keep track of everyone's mail, Fullmetal, but I'll have my secretary look into it for you. As for things here in Central, everything is going well. I just wanted to ask you personally how you were doing after the Scar attack. I hope you and your brother are almost ready to return to duty, and that Armstrong is recovering well?"

"Well, we're getting closer. My automail mechanic's out here with us. She just got back to the hotel with the parts to fix my arm and leg. After I've at least got my arm back, I can fix Al's armor. The Major's still pretty banged up and limping, but I think he's getting better. You want me to put him on?"

"That's alright. Has Colonel Mustang explained things to you yet?"

Ed's heart skipped a beat. "Mustang? I haven't heard from him since I was back in the city. Was he supposed to call and complain about my handwriting or something? I can ask Granny Pinako if anyone left me a message."

Bradley was quiet for a couple moments too long, Ed thought. He was judging Ed's words.

"No, don't bother. It was nothing important. Just make sure you start reporting on time and that you actually fill out your paperwork. I know it's a drag, but it slows everyone down when you're late or don't bother with it. But about Pinako, it had almost slipped my mind. I have some troubling news."

Ed gripped the phone tighter. "What do you-"

"I'm sorry, that was an alarming word choice. She's alright, but I'm afraid she's been taken into Government custody for possession of a chimera. It would appear that you've been shirking your duties in keeping an eye on it," He said sternly.

"That's bullcrap!" Ed hollered, "You know she's not responsible for Nina. I just left her there for a few days while I got my repairs done, is all! I take full responsibility, so just-"

"Whoa there, Fullmetal! I know the whole situation, and I'm getting to it. I'm just swamped with other things. I'll make sure no harm comes to either of them, and as soon as I can, I'll have the paperwork drawn up for their release. The military would never mistreat a helpless old woman, innocent child, or sweet little dog, let alone a combination of the three." Bradley's voice had a disconcerting edge to it as he wrapped up the conversation with, "Just make sure you keep checking in so it doesn't slip my mind. Old age, you know. And if you see or hear from Mustang or his team, check in immediately so I can give you further instructions. That's all."

"...Yes, Sir."

"Keep up the good work."

Click.

 

 

Back in his office in Central, Bradley was sweating bullets. His bluff had worked. His officers had reported in that morning, informing him that Pinako Rockbell and the chimera were nowhere to be found in Resembool. A neighbor had been at the house, watering the flowers on her behalf, and made a statement that the old woman was out of town for a surprise holiday. She hadn't said where to, aside from, 'Somewhere with a good bar,' and had asked to have the plants cared for and for Den to stay with them until she got back, which might be some time.  It appeared that Fullmetal knew nothing of this, nor of Mustang's location. Good. No actual hostages were necessary, so long as the loudmouthed little brat thought they might be in danger. Still, it would be better to find the two missing parties and actually bring them in, if possible.

"We have two more missing suspicious parties," He told his secretary, "Send in the sketch artist and tell him this time it's an old lady and her ugly dog."

"Nine missing persons and a dog?" Elaine fretted, "Are they more soldiers or military family?"

"I'm afraid so," Bradley said, mentally correcting her number to eleven counting Envy, "I'm worried that Scar might be back in town, targeting more than just State Alchemists. Issue a warning to all personnel to make sure their families are keeping the doors locked and staying in well-lit, populated places, preferably in groups. Also, for patrols, I want everyone to pair up. No more solo soldiers, no matter how low-ranking the task is. I also want at least one armed officer guarding each floor of this building at all times."

"Yes, Sir!"

"Thank you, Elaine. After you've sent the sketch artist up and the report's typed and sent out for mass-printing, you can go. Have somebody walk you home."

"I will. Thank you for your concern, Fuhrer Bradley. It's reassuring to know that you care so deeply for all of us." She smiled earnestly. What a bleeding heart, Bradley thought as he waved her out of the room, faking his own smile. Just like Hughes and every other idealistic moron he'd met in his reign.


	19. Sibling Shenanigans

It was abundantly clear to Greed that Envy must be out of options, but he didn't get the chance to lord shit over his siblings very often anymore, and he sure as Hell wasn't about to let this golden opportunity slip through his fingers.

"Hey, Envy. Long time no see. What's with the sorry face you're making? Finally piss off the old man so bad you were scared he was gonna remake you?" He almost pulled away in disgust as his hand met Envy's head and ruffled the hair, but the damage was done anyway. He'd just wipe it on his pants later.

"Shut up! I don't know. That's the problem." Envy swatted their brother's hand away, fuming.

"How do you not know?"

"I never reported back in after the failed mission. I just kept moving. I thought about going back the next day, but I overheard some officers talking and it turns out that failing to kill that guy with the shitty beard and the shitty family made one of the sacrifices run away with him. Now they both know too much, Wrath and Father have no idea where they are, I haven't reported back in several days but they know I completely failed, and I have nowhere to go."

Greed placed a hand on their shoulder. "I have no idea what most of that was about, but it sounds like you fucked up an important piece of one of Father's big plans and now you're lookin' over your shoulder all the time and don't know where to go next. Since you're here, I gather you've known where I've been hanging out for some time?"

"Not exact location, no, but you weren't hard to find."

"Who else knows?"

"Lust has a pretty good idea."

"Father?"

"No. We never mentioned it to him."

"Why not?"

"He never asked. He said you'd come back in your own time."

"Fat chance. But it sounds like you've done me a solid by not ratting me out, so here's the deal: I've got a pretty good thing going and I don't want you screwing it up with your usual loud-mouthed, poor-tempered, murdery bullshit. The ground rules for anyone who wants to join my gang are, in order:

One: Everything is my stuff.

Two: Don't break my stuff.

Three: By everything I also mean my crew so don't break them either.

Four: No matter who wins rock-paper-scissors for the last slice of pizza (everyone MUST play) I always get half. Not just crust either we cut it vertically.

Five: Always do as I say.

There are other rules but those are the big ones. So, are you in?"

Envy wrinkled their nose in disgust. "You want me to hang out in the slums with you and a bunch of humans?"

"And chimeras."

"Great. Humans and chimeras."

"And you also have to do what I say or I'll kick your ass."

"You wanna try it?"

"Ooh, careful, don't want to get carried away and do anything that Father might notice! Or maybe I'll just pay him a visit and he'll spare me if I happen to spill the beans about where you are, since he's probably way madder at you than me."

"Greed! Don't tell!"

"So are you in?"

"Fine! Just don't make me do anything too embarrassing."

"Great! Shave your head and make yourself look way cooler than you actually are so I'm not embarrassed to introduce you as the new guy."

"I am NOT-"

"Right. No need to shave-just morph so you look bald!"

"GREED."

 

 

By mid afternoon, the gang knew that there was a new member. They seemed skeptical at first, but once Greed mentioned that they were siblings (and showed off their matching "tattoos" as proof), Envy was accepted quickly enough.

"Is they the new second-in-command?" A blonde questioned.

"No way. They're too damn stupid for that," Greed assured her, "And besides, they're still completely new. Doesn't know how things operate around here. Speaking of, who wants to take the rookie for the day to shadow their patrol? Any volunteers?"

Quiet.

"Fine. I'll take day one, show the new kid the ropes and so on, how to wrestle up business. After today, though, you're all gonna have to step up! C'mon, Envy, let's hit the town."

They'd been out and about for around twenty minutes when they hit the train station.

"Folks are always coming and going here. It's a good place to swipe wallets and such, or push merchandise."

"What do we sell?"

"Nothing right now. I forgot the entire case of goods back home. Buy usually, stolen stuff. Watches, alchemy journals, whatever."

"This is humiliating. Why do we-"

"Envy shut up right now. Look." Greed was pointing to a woman in a towering hat. It was absolutely gigantic. Furthermore, it was the worst hat envy had ever laid eyes on. Terrible. Looked like someone had just stacked garbage on a feather-covered rim until they ran out. An over-abundance of bows and little fabric flowers covered in glitter was the icing on the disastrous, mustard-yellow monstrosity. There was no attempt at color coordination. Envy could hear bells every time the woman moved, and suspected that there were several hidden among the other gratuitous decorations on the hat.

"That's the worse hat I've ever seen."

"I want it. Envy, I have to get that hat. Forget learning the ropes. We need to brainstorm ideas on how to get me that hat."

"Of course you want it. Why would I expect anything else from you." They rolled their eyes. "Fine. I've got an idea." 

Envy morphed into a large bird-a hawk- and swooped the woman, interrupting the argument she'd been having with a mouthy gentleman on the platform with her. They sank their talons into the stack of decorations and attempted to pull up, but found that it was too heavy. All they could manage was to knock it sideways on the woman's head before a book struck them square in the chest.

"Get away from her, you brute! Go on, shoo! Tasteless bird! Go find a better hat to steal!"

"My hats aren't ugly! This bird has divine taste, you old sot!"

"I never would have married you if I'd known you were going to insist on keeping your collection of terrible hats. What will my parents think when we visit them on their vacation in Xing if you show up wearing one of those? Don't you care about making a good impression?"

"I care about my hats! I work hard on them."

Envy flapped awkwardly back to where Greed was hiding and returned to their normal form.

"That woman has the worst taste in hats and a terrible marriage. What a tough break," they panted.

"Well, I don't want the details on her marriage right now, Envy. Save the gossip for the dinner table. I want that hat!"

"Yeah, yeah, I've got a backup plan. Go ask the guy for directions somewhere. That'll keep him talking long enough for me to swipe the broad's hat."

"He's a visitor. He won't know where anything is."

"I bet he'll talk like he does."

"This better work."

Greed strolled over to the young couple and waved.

"Hey! Sorry to bother you. I arrived on the last train in. Are you local? I'm looking for a hotel in this town."

The gentleman immediately led Greed to the other side of the platform, pointing onward.

"I once stayed in a town three stops up with my parents as a boy. There was a hotel there with the most interesting wooden chairs! The craftsmanship was remarkable. Surely imported from..."

Envy took the form of some kid he'd seen back in Central and raced toward the woman. Without saying a word, they leaped into the air and grabbed the hat, ignoring the woman's protests as they booked it back into town. Greed broke off from the conversation with the man, who hadn't even noticed his wife's predicament, and followed at a much more casual pace.

"See?" Envy panted, once they met up in an alley, "Told you I could get it."

"Nice work! Let's grab some dinner for the gang and I'll tell 'em how I came to be in possession of this..." He tried to call it a hat. He really did. "This!"

 

Back on the platform, a very upset woman re-boarded the train with her brand-new terrible husband and no terrible hat to speak of. She'd have to dig through her luggage for another, whether or not her spouse complained. She could tell that today was going to be another very long, unhappy day.


	20. Parting Ways

"I'm glad Ed and Al are all patched up now," Hughes announced, "I worry about those boys!"

"I'm sure they'll be fine. Nobody's after them anymore, you know. Besides, they said they were going to meet up with their teacher in Dublith. I'm sure she'll take good care of them. Teachers are always nurturing." Gracia ran her fingers through sleeping Elicia's hair as she carried her and added, "That's part of why I wanted to be a teacher."

"Well, no need to give up on that dream yet," Her husband told her, "You could still tutor, at the very least."

"Maes, we're in hiding! There's nobody for me to teach here, except Elicia."

"I'm sure we'll come across someone who needs a little help learning something eventually."

Scar cleared his throat awkwardly. "I actually know a lot of people who could really use some help with academics," he said.

"Oh? Where?"

"Where we're headed, there are plenty of people-adults and children alike- who don't know how to read or write. They can't afford basic education, not that they'd be allowed to enroll in the first place."

"Why not?"

"They're Ishvalan refugees, forced to live in hiding in tent villages outside of big cities. There's plenty of settlements like the one we're headed to all over Amestris. East City is slightly more tolerant than other areas, so long as we don't try to stay within the city itself, so this is probably the largest of the slums."

"What's it like living there?"

"Not what you're used to, but not as bad as it could be. My people are kind, and know how to keep secrets. You'll be safe, if nothing else. Still, there are some things you should know before we get there.

Try to be respectful of our customs. If we feel you should know something, we'll tell you, but otherwise we must keep some things between ourselves and God. Speaking of which, names are sacred. Don't ask for someone's name. Ask what you may call them."

Gracia and Maes nodded. 

"Thank you for telling us."

The terrain got more unruly as they ventured farther from the East City train station. Scar took them through winding alleyways, dark and damp with broken brick which faded to dirt.  As they exited the city limits, they began finding debris and garbage scattered along the pathway from illegally dumped furniture and other miscellaneous bits.

"People need to learn how to properly dispose of their trash," Hughes fumed, "Look at this mess!"

"It's a shame the way they treat nature," Scar agreed, "But while you're living in the slums this sort of thing can be pretty helpful. You can recycle a lot of what you find, if you get desperate."

 

* * *

 

Hawkeye had her legs up on the train seat opposite them. She didn't mind these long rides- the sights were beautiful, even in the desert. Too bad Mustang couldn't sit still long enough to enjoy it.

"How much longer are we going to be in this rolling sweatbox?" He complained.

"Probably about seven hours today and nine tomorrow. Sit down, you're being conspicuous."

"It's perfectly normal to be impatient on a train."

"Just sleep through the ride like you did through your work."

"Fine." He lowered his voice before adding, "Did you manage to get in contact with anyone?"

"Breda. He pretended I was his girlfriend. I told him we'd be in the Xerxes ruins through Morse code. He's going to make sure Havoc sends supplies our way now and again. He'll let us know when the investigation on us eases up a bit. I also told him that the Hughes were safe, but forgot to mention where they'd be. Falman is taking care of Hayate for me."

Mustang nodded. He was grateful for his team- even as a traitor, they trusted him beyond a shadow of a doubt. He was lucky to have them.

"What's our story this time?" He asked.

"We're not dressed nicely enough for second honeymoon. We should just tell the Innkeeper we're on our way to Lior because we heard of the miracles that were happening there. If they know it was a hoax, we can just pretend that we want to see for ourselves."

"That'll work. Tourists are stupid enough to flock to Lior in hard times."

They'd be in the ruins for at least a month, they'd decided. From there, they could likely move to East City and hide among the larger population. The Hughes family would be nearby, and they could re-establish contact. With any luck, the Elric brothers would be able to send them small sums of money not long after they moved in. Mustang would also have his team keep an eye open for Grandmother Rockbell and Nina. If they got any information about either party, they'd report in to Mustang and he could pass it along to the Elrics or to Winry. If they truly were imprisoned in Central, breaking them out would be nearly impossible. Keeping them hostage kept the brothers under Bradley's thumb for as long as he wanted. Just thinking about it made Roy bitter.

Even off the battlefield, war policies reigned. That would change when he took charge. Policies would be re-written, unjustly imprisoned persons would be released, and soldiers would be held accountable for their actions in Ishval, himself included.

"Keep grinding your teeth," Riza advised, "It'll tire out your jaw and help you shut up."

Roy suddenly became aware of how tightly his teeth were clenched and how sore his jaw was for it.

"Very funny." He sat across from Riza and one seat over so that he, too, could put his feet up. "Wake me when we get to the Resembool station."

"Try not to snore the whole way. You'll get us thrown off."


	21. Pinako and Nina Join a Street Gang

"Paint a picture if you're gonna keep staring," Pinako snapped, "It'll last longer." She reached back to pat Nina reassuringly on the shoulder as the girl trembled behind her legs. A stranger had found them settled in for another night outside and had been hanging out in a shadow for a concerning amount of time, even for how concerning that activity might already be.

"Sorry, lady, it's just-" The tall, dark-haired man peeked over his shitty round glasses, "That's a real interesting dog you've got there. He got a name?"

" _She_ is Nina."

"She know any special tricks?" He placed an odd emphasis on the last two words.

"Yeah. Sick 'em."

"Is that all?" He squatted down, making friendly little sounds to draw Nina closer. When she kept herself firmly planted behind Pinako's legs, he grinned. "I would have expected more from a chimera."

Pinako's heart caught in her throat.

"Who are you and what do you want?"

"Oh, I thought you'd never ask. The name's Greed. I want everything- money, power, sex, women--"

"Disgusting. You won't find any of those things here."

"-And that chimera."

"Why?"

He avoided the question, instead opting to make a proposition.

"Quit your day job," He said.

"I'm unemployed."

"Join my street gang. It's pretty obvious that you've been living rough for several days. Dublith's not a real forgiving place, and it certainly isn't the kind of city where you want to be sleeping on the streets. I take it you're pretty desperate to be hanging out in an alley at night with that thing."

"Maybe I should have asked a little louder so you could hear me over the sound of your own voice: What. Do you want. With Nina?"

"I dunno. She looks cool. Never seen one like her. All the other chimeras back at the hideout look more human, and they can talk."

"More...Like Nina? Nina people?" The girl's tail wagged a little at the prospect, and she started creeping out from behind Pinako's legs. "Nina people!" She said excitedly, " _Nina people_!"

"Oh, so this one can talk, too. Doesn't seem very bright, though." Greed examined her more closely. "How old is she?"

"She's just a child. Her father did this to her, from what I understand. If you've got some sort of idea that you can treat her like some sort of science project, I-"

"Whoa, lady! The other chimeras in my gang aren't science projects, they're thugs! Y'know, I have them steal shit for me or pedal stuff on the black market or whatever. Y'know, stand-up, hard-workin' gangsters." He offered a hand. "The kinda people who could keep you two safe and hidden."

"I won't have Nina thieving!"

"Well no shit. It's not like she has thumbs or anything. Plus, if she really is a kid, she'd get caught right away. You don't look like you'd move very fast, either, so for now I guess you two would basically just hang around the hideout. I guess I could find yarn or whatever so you could knit or whatever old people do."

" _Knitting_?"

"Fine, whatever, _crochet_. You know what I mean."

"What makes you so sure I can do either?"

"Can you?"

"...Yes, but not because I'm old."

"It's settled, then! C'mon, I'll introduce you to the gang. You'll be the newest members, but you'll still probably be more useful than Envy."

"Do you all have bizarre names like that?"

"No, just me and Envy. If you don't like your names, though, I can give you Aliases. You can be Grandma and Nina can be Little Red."

"I don't want an alias."

"Too late it sounds cool. I'll tell everyone to call you guys Grandma and Little Red. It'll catch on."

It was a long walk back through narrow streets and labrynthian sewers. Pinako wasn't sure how the gang found their way around like this. She was already positive that she was completely lost and would never be able to find her way back to where they'd been. It was cold, damp, and in poor repair no matter where they went. Finally, thry rounded a final corner and entered through the back door of a boarded up building.

"Everyone, look at me! I'm Greed, and I want everything- especially to eat bugs!" A man identical to the one leading them was standing in the center of a shabby room, dancing about while several other odd-looking folks laughed and applauded.

"Envy! I told you to knock it off!" Greed whipped around. "I don't eat bugs. It was _one_ time and it was an _accident_ , but Envy's never gonna let it go, which is AWFULLY BOLD for someone who FORGOT HOW MANY LEGS A FISH HAD ONCE. IT'S NONE, ENVY. FISH DON'T HAVE LEGS BUT YOU HAD THREE."

"Shut up, I was in a hurry! Who's the old lady?"

"You can all call her Grandma," Greed told the gang.

"Call me Pinako, and this is Nina. She's not a dog."

"Don't call them Pinako and Nina their names are Grandma and Little Red now."

"Why isn't Nina the big bad wolf?"

"Because that's a mouthful and also she's just a kid she's not bad. Everyone be nice to Nina. That means you, Envy."

"Who's the woodsman? Are we all getting nicknames, now?"

"No. Just those two because it's cool."

Introductions took a painfully long time to get through, but the gang got through it. It was decided that Pinako's job would be to take care of Nina and knit stuff once they found her some yarn and a pair of knitting needles. They weren't really sure what kind of stuff, but they'd figure it out. Greed was sure he'd want whatever it was, anyway, so it didn't really matter that much. He'd always thought it would be sort of cool to have a grandmother around, anyway. Or a mother. Or a father who didn't want to kill him and make him come back as a different but still sort-of-the-same person every time he disapproved of something.

Or a dog, or a little sister. Now he had something close enough to both, though he wasn't so sure about the aesthetic. He might tweak her look, later, if he could figure out how. Whoever her father was had to have been a shitty alchemist. Her paws were too big, and it couldn't be very comfortable being hunched over like that all the time. He'd have to pull some strings and see what sort of info he could scrape together. He considered himself somewhat of an expert on hanging around with chimeras.

"I want to know how long it took you all to figure out how to navigate the sewers well enough to get back here," Pinako was saying when Greed tuned back in to the conversation.

"What? He took you the long way? Were you like, being chased or something?"

"No. He found us in the alleyway over by Fifth and Market, settled in for the night."

"Heading straight up Market would have been faster, then," Bido pointed out.

"I didn't want to pass the butcher shop. I hear the Elric brothers are in town visiting their old masters, and if something caught my eye I'm not exactly in the mood to fight them with Grandma and Little Red hangin' around."

"Did you say the Elric brothers were in town?" Pinako was regretting following this dipshit less and less.

"Yeah, the Fullmetal Alchemist and his short brother and some girl pulled into the station yesterday, I think. I want to talk to 'em about something, but not with you two in tow."

"Oh? And just what do you want to talk to them about, exactly?" She was getting puffed up and protective again.

"Nothin' you'd understand! Just forget it, alright? I'm not gonna get in a fight that'd get you and the kid mixed up in it or anything, so-"

"You're not getting in a fight with Ed and Al, period! I won't allow it."

"Who the Hell are-" It clicked in Greed's head.

"The Fullmetal Alchemist and his brother, in the suit of armor. I raised them, and if you think you can threaten them, you've got another thing coming."

"Oh, man, this is perfect! I just wanted some info, and now I've got the perfect go-between. I don't even have to kidnap 'em or anything- I'll just tell 'em you wanna see them!" He paused and added, "You do, right? You aren't having some weird family issue or whatever that might make them not want to see you?"

Pinako went back and forth with Greed, not giving him any information while he did the same with her. They played verbal ping-pong until the rest of the gang had pretty much left to get some peace and quiet from the argument. Finally, Greed relented and admitted that he was after information about immortality and their research on Philosopher's Stones. He had no intention of hurting the Elrics, if he could avoid it, but if a fight was what it took, he was sure he had the upper hand.

"Oh. Well, if that's all you want to know, I can tell you it's been one failure after another for them. They have their own reasons for researching the stone, and it's all been dead end after dead end, and every sliver of hope they find ends up shattered."

"Wow, that sucks. But hey, maybe if we team up, I can help 'em out. They scratch my back and I'll scratch theirs."

"They're not going to tell you anything."

Greed shrugged. "Not if I don't ask. But you want to talk to them anyway, so how about we just combine our interests, eh? We'll meet in a semi-public place where we can still have a private conversation and you don't have to worry about me starting a fight. All you have to do is ask 'em to keep me updated on their research. Fair enough?"

Pinako begrudgingly agreed. Ed could always lie, anyway, and it wasn't like she could just let what might be her only chance to get into contact with him disappear.

"Fine. But you best keep your end of the bargain and not start anything."

"No worries. I'll have one of the guys leave 'em a note explaining everything so we're all on the same page and nobody shows up thinking i'm trying to start something."

* * *

 

"Ed, Al, some asshole left you some fanmail," Izumi told them, hurling the envelope at Ed's face, "Tell them not to turn my business into a post office next time!"

"What's it say, Al?" Ed asked, holding his cheek. Only their teacher could throw an envelope like a ninja star and make it stick. He peeked over his brother's shoulder as they both read.

 

**EDWARD AND ALPHONSE ELRIC,**

 

**WE HAVE YOUR GRANDMOTHER. MEET AT THE TRAIN STATION TOMORROW AT NOON. COME ALONE TO DISCUSS SOMETHING WITH US.**

 

**P.S. NOT ALONE AS IN JUST ONE OF YOU. BOTH OF YOU SHOULD COME BUT DON'T BRING ANYBODY ELSE.**

 

Ed ripped the letter out of Al's hands, cursing.

"Well, Al, sounds like someone's trying to start something! If it's a fight they want, we'll show 'em. Especially since they think they can pretend they've got Pinako. I'm not in the mood to deal with that kind of crap!"

"Agreed. We'll show them not to mess with family!"

 


	22. What's Updog

"Hey, you've been alive a long time, right?" Envy was watching half-watching the ripples in the fountain water as they waited for the Elric brothers to show up.

"You calling me old?" Pinako demanded.

"Yeah, basically. But I was wondering if you know whether walnut shells are made of wood or not. It seems like something that might be wood but wood doesn't quite seem like the right word for it."

"Ask Ed when he gets here. Alchemists know about the structures of things. He's an idiot, but maybe he'll know anyway."

"Does that mean you don't?"

"It means if I did, I wouldn't tell you."

"Grouch."

"Brat."

"Quit squabbling, you shitheads. We're trying to keep a low profile." Martel was picking the dirt from the tread of her boots with a stick. "And for the record, nutshells are made of updog."

"What's updog?" Envy asked.

"Ask Dolcetto."

Envy didn't get to finish processing the joke before Ed's voice shattered the peace like a Christmas ornament beneath a boot.

"YOU BASTARDS! I'LL TEACH YOU TO HOLD MY FAMILY HOSTAGE!"

Several heads turned as Ed slapped his hands together, ready to attack.

"Stop that, you flaming pipsqueak! Get over here and talk it out like an adult! They even went through the trouble of writing you a letter." Pinako hopped down and made her way over to Ed, who dropped his guard. "You're shorter than the last time, if that's even possible, but I'm happy to see you." She took his hand and patted the top affectionately.

"I'm not short," Ed protested haphazardly, "And more importantly, where the Hell have you been? Winry's been worried, you know. How did you escape the Government? Or did Bradley finish the paperwork to get you out and just forgot to tell us?"

"Let's go talk somewhere private," Pinako suggested. "Is Winry with you?"

"No. The letter said to come alone, and we didn't want to drag her into another fight, so we sent her to the train station to look out for any suspicious characters."

"Go get her and take Martel with you so she can take you to the hideout. I'll go back with Al and the idiot."

"I have a name, you know," Envy spat.

"Tweedle Dum, was it?"

"Watch your mouth, Grandma, Greed's not here to babysit!"

"I know. That's why he sent me along with you kids."

The entire trip back was a seemingly endless stream of bickering back and forth between Envy and Pinako while Al listened. In some ways, it reminded him of growing up and listening to Ed argue about every little thing. He missed that, sometimes. Now, however, he was reminded of why the old days used to be so annoying.

"The Fullmetal Alchemist," Greed said with an appreciative whistle, "Nice to finally meet you in the flesh."

"Actually, Ed's the Fullmetal Alchemist. I'm his bother, Alphonse."

"And he has no flesh," Dolcetto added with a sniff, "Just metal."

"How confusing is that?" Greed crossed his arms, "What, do they call you the No-Armor Alchemist or something?"

"No, people call me Al, because that's my name."

"Al...? Big Brother Al here...?" Heavy, unbalanced steps pattered quickly from the next room as Nina rounded the corner. "Big Brother Al here! Brother...Al...!"

"Nina!" The younger brother dropped to his knees and greeted Nina fondly with a hug. "I like your hair," He told her, admiring the waterfall braid running down the length of her great mane.

"Yeah, Bido's pretty handy with hair for a bald guy." Greed pointed to a rather shy looking fellow peeking out of the doorway Nina had come from. 

"We're still waiting on one more guest, but-"

"Two. Winry's coming, too," Al informed his odd host.

"-Two more guests, I guess, but everyone meet up in the main room anyway! We're going to do introductions when they get here."

"Are they joining the gang?" Dolcetto asked.

"Don't know yet. Depends on how annoying they are. Envy is pretty much as bad as I can tolerate, so we'll see."

"At least I don't eat bugs or say creepy things to strangers like you!" Envy mimicked their brother's voice and put a hand on their hip, pointing to themself with the other. "The name's Greed, and I want everything. Money, power, sex, women--"

"Shut up! My introduction's cool, and I'm waiting 'till both brothers are here, so knock it off with the spoilers! Besides, you could never pull it off as well as me, you crappy little stringbean. When you say it, it's _weird_."

Al prayed that his brother would hurry up and bring Winry so they could get Pinako and Nina and leave before he had to listen to any more arguing.

 

 


	23. Sometimes a family is two rocks and a pack of idiots plus Winry, Pinako,and Nina

"So, that's basically what we're about," Greed finished with a grin, "And since I want everything, including immortality, and I'm doing you a favor by kepping your Grandma and the chimera kid hidden, I was thinkin' maybe you could do me a solid and share your research about getting your bodies back. I might be able to use some of that know-how to, say, live forever, or fix Nina to be a little more human-looking. Whaddya say?"

Ed and Al exchanged a glance.

"Might as well," Ed muttered, "Maybe he'll know more about it than us, anyway, since he obviously knows more about chimeras."

"Great! Gang, head out and get back to the grind. I want the place to myself for a bit. One of you take Little Red to the park or something while the grownups talk, but be careful not to let the cops see ya. Granny and the family can stay and after we talk they can catch up."

"What about me?" Envy demanded.

"Oh, right, you don't know how to do anything yet. You can stay, too, I guess, but shut up."

The gang cleared out as Greed had ordered, splitting up to cover different parts of town.

"Wait! I almost forgot." Envy strode up to Dolcetto. "What's Updog?"

With an exasperated sigh, Dolcetto replied, "Nothin' much, what's up with you?" And passed a few coins to Martel. A glorious bet had been settled.

"Played you like a fiddle," The blonde told Envy with a grin as she slipped by.

Dolcetto begrudgingly called Nina to his side and headed off for the park. Maybe babysitting would lift his spirits after such a crushing defeat.

Once everone was gone, Ed cleared his throat.

"Have you ever heard of a Philosopher's stone?" He asked in a low, serious tone.

Greed and Envy exchanged a stone-faced, knowing glance.

"Yep."

"How much do you know about it?"

"More than you, I'm sure."

"Anyone ever tell you how they're made?"

"...We have a pretty good idea, yeah."

"Supposedly, they can help a person to perform incredible acts of alchemy by bypassing equivalent exchange- my brother and I have seen it in action more than once, though they were just fakes or incomplete. We were willing to bet that if we got a hold of a complete one, we'd be able to get our bodies back, but..." Ed trailed off.

"...But using a Philosopher's stone, let alone _creating_ one, is just out of the question, morally speaking." Al finished, "So we're looking for another way."

"That's all you've got?" Envy asked incredulously, "Your big plan was 'get a Philosopher's stone' and now that you know how they're made it's sunk your ship?"

Greed elbowed them and shot a warning glance. "Man, that sucks. Keep digging, though, and let me know what you find. Maybe me and the gang could help you out. That said, your basic understanding of the stone isn't far off. You know how it's made, but the function? Still off. It doesn't bypass equivalent exchange. Can't do that. But since it's full of human souls, you can use their energy to amplify your transmutations 'till it runs out of juice and breaks."

"That's even worse," Ed spat.

"How do you know that?" Pinako inquired, speaking up from across the room. She'd been eavesdropping while she and Winry caught up.

"Well, if we didn't know that much, we'd be pretty stupid," Envy said, "Since we're made from 'em and all." They pointed to their mark.

"We're homunculi," Greed explained, showing off his own mark, "Created people. We're like humans, but better. Except Envy. Envy is still pretty lame."

"Father didn't think so when he picked me for the missions instead of you!"

"Well, yeah, because I'm not some kiss-ass. And besides, look how well that turned out! I don't exactly see either of us goin' home to a welcome party. I bailed and you screwed up, so it's not like Father's opinion matters anymore."

Al cut them off before they could continue their petty sibling argument.

"Are there more of you? Homunculi, I mean."

"Yeah, there's seven of us, but we're the best two." Greed clapped a hand on Envy's shoulder.

"Except maybe Wrath."

"Okay, Wrath is pretty strong, too, but we're definitely the top three."

"And Lust."

"Yeah, Lust, too. Remember that time she threw you over a table for taking her eye liner?"

"Didn't Pride snap your arm for going in his room once?"

"Yeah. I hadn't been in his room. Fine. Five. The five of us are the strongest."

"But Sloth-"

"Stop talking, Envy."

Seven created lifeforms. Ed was having trouble coming to terms with it.

"Are you...The products of human transmutation?"

"No. We're not humans. That'd be breaking the rules. We just look human, except when Envy is pretending to be some other thing like a carrot or a bird or shoe or whatever. We're separate parts of Father's personality. Namely, the parts he wanted to get rid off to make himself perfect."

"It still doesn't feel right," Al said.

"Oh, well _excuse_ us for being created. We didn't exactly ask for it, kid."

"Sorry."

A few uncomfortable moments of silence passed before Winry spoke up.

"Philosopher's stones can help you with your alchemy, right? Between the two of you, would it be possible to help Nina to be more comfortable?"

Envy and Greed exchanged a glance.

"You're the shapeshifting expert," Greed said, "So your call on whether or not this is possible."

Envy took more time to think about that question that they'd ever taken to think about anything before. After those seven intense seconds, they shook their head.

"I'm good at transforming myself and not dying. I'd have to practice before I tried transmuting some other living thing, and no guarantee I wouldn't screw it up anyway. All the systems are so intricate..." After a beat, though, they shrugged. "I'll start small with plants or something. If I can transmute little flower petals or whatever without destroying the xylem and phloem, I'll move up to a fish and keep going. Not much else to do around here, anyway, so might as well try for a little bit."

"If you figure it out you have to teach me. I want to know," Greed told his sibling.

"If I figure it out you have to admit I'm cooler before I teach you."

"Don't push your luck."

Amid the chaos and confusion came a glimmer of hope. With two homunculi on their side, things were starting to take a turn for the better for the family, even with the government breathing down their necks.

**Author's Note:**

> Update: 4/22/18
> 
> I've got some home problems going on and updates are going to be farther between for a little while. Sorry about this! I'll add more as I have the time. Thank you, everyone!


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